I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all
over it and put your name at the top.
-- English Professor, Ohio University For the memory of love is sweet, though the love itself were in vain. And what I have lost of
pleasure, assuage what I find of pain.
-- Lyster ARDOR, n. The quality that distinguishes love without knowledge.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 "Ask five economists and you'll get five different answers (six if one went to Harvard)." (Edgar R. Fiedler) "And on the seventh day, God stepped back and said 'There is my creation, perfect in every way ... oh, damn it, I left pot all over the place. Now they'll think I want them to smoke it. Now I have to Financial Services Well, I think that it's a- it's had some difficult times but I think we have- we, I think, have been able
to make some very good progress and it's- I would say that it's- it's- it's delightful that w Our schools have been scientifically designed to prevent over-education from happening. [...] The
average American (should be) content with their humble role in life, because they're not tempted
to Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy action.
- Auric Goldfinger, in Goldfinger by Ian L. Fleming Financial Services
My wife ran off with my best friend last week. I miss him! "Well begun is half done." (Aristotle) In answer to the question of why it happened, I offer the modest proposal that our Universe is
simply one of those things which happen from time to time.
-- Edward P. Tryon If I tell a lie it's only because I think I'm telling the truth.
-- Phil Gaglardi, Minister of Highways, British Columbia, Canada There are not enough Indians in the world to defeat the Seventh Cavalry.
-- George Armstrong Custer Financial Services "What is the difference between exploring and being lost?" (Dan Eldon, photojournalist) You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty.
- Sacha Guitry Love is not blind - it sees more, not less. But because it sees more, it is willing to see less.
Rabbi Julius Gordon Financial Services
"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." (Oscar Wilde) A memorandum is written not to inform the reader but to protect the writer.
-- Dean Acheson With the fearful strain that is on me night and day, if I did not laugh I should die.
-- Abraham Lincoln My mother-in-law broke up my marriage. My wife came home from work one day and found me in
bed with her.
-- Lenny Bruce The marriage of Marxism and feminism has been like the marriage of husband and wife depicted in English common law: Marxism and feminism are one, and that one is Marxism. --Heidi Hartmann [The Unhappy Financial Services In view of all the deadly computer viruses that have been spreading lately, Weekend Update
would like to remind you: when you link up to another computer, you're linking up to every
computer that th As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.
-- Proverbs 23:7 I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
- Mark Twain Financial Services
The lover knows much more about absolute good and universal beauty than any logician or
theologian, unless the latter, too, be lovers in disguise.
-- George Santayana Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to
do...but she's certain that her boy will never get as great a wife as his father did.
-- Anonymous "Our character is what we do when we think no one is looking." (H. Jackson Brown (Jr.) Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves.
-- Abraham Lincoln There are those who look at things the way they are, and ask why... I dream of things that never
were, and ask why not?
-- Robert Francis Kennedy Financial Services I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with
typewriters.
- Frank Lloyd Wright When I give a lecture, I accept that people look at their watches, but what I do not tolerate is
when they look at it and raise it to their ear to find out if it stopped.
-- Marcel Achard "The man who never made a mistake never made anything." (Derek Longdon, Tongariro Power Development, Turangi, New Zealand) Financial Services
Success is just a matter of attitude.
-- Darcy E. Gibbons Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than
you is a maniac.
-- George Carlin By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. -- Socrates Everything has been figured out, except how to live.
- Jean-Paul Sartre When you steal from one author, it's plagiarism; if you steal from many, it's research.
-- Wilson Mizner Financial Services There is no realizable power that man cannot, in time, fashion the tools to attain, nor any power so secure that the naked ape will not abuse it. So it is written in the genetic cards - only physics a Books, like friends, should be few and well chosen.
-- Samuel Paterson "I heard the old, old, men say 'all that's beautiful drifts away, like the waters.'" (William Butler Yeats) Financial Services
"One often contradicts an opinion when what is uncongenial is really the tone in which it was conveyed." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them
good.
-- H.L. Mencken Love is the delusion that one man or woman differs from another.
-- H. L. Mencken Fill the unforgiving minute with sixty seconds worth of distance run.
- Rudyard Kipling The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing that you will make one.
-- Ellen Hubbard Financial Services The great thing in this world is not so much where we stand as in what direction we are going.
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes "Ideas are far more powerful than guns. We don't allow our enemies to have guns, why should we allow them to have ideas?" (Josef Stalin) "The love of liberty is the love of others; the love of power is the love of ourselves." (William Hazlitt) Financial Services
The telephone company is urging people to *please* not use the telephone unless it is absolutely
necessary in order to keep the lines open for emergency personnel. We'll be right back after this
bre Church is only society on earth that exists for the benefit of non-members.
-- William Temple Substitute "damn" every time you're inclined to write "very"; your editor will delete it and the
writing will be just as it should be.
-- Mark Twain Marital Freedom: The liberty that allows a husband to do exactly that which his wife pleases.
-- Anonymous "The overman ... Who has organized the chaos of his passions, given style to his character, and become creative. Aware of life's terrors, he affirms life without resentment." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietz Financial Services You can't shake hands with a clenched fist.
-- Indira Gandhi "REASONABLE, adj. Accessible to the infection of our own opinions. Hospitable to persuasion, dissuasion and evasion." (Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary) The story of a love is not important - what is important is that one is capable of love. It is perhaps
the only glimpse we are permitted of eternity.
-- Helen Hayes Financial Services
That's the nature of research--you don't know what in hell you're doing.
-- 'Doc' Edgerton No one really listens to anyone else, and if you try it for a while you'll see why.
-- Mignon McLaughlin "... adults are just obsolete children and the hell with them." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991, quoted in his obituary, Time) The great art of life is sensation, to feel that we exist, even in pain.
-- Lord Byron The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.
-- Albert Einstein Financial Services "I have never met a man so ignorant that I couldn't learn something from him." (Galileo Galilei) Football incorporates the two worst elements of American society: violence punctuated by
committee meetings.
-- George F. Will, journalist, political commentator, 1994 Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein Financial Services
"If a man does not make new acquaintances as he advances through life, he will soon find himself left alone. A man, sir, should keep his friendship in a constant repair." (Samuel Johnson) Miracles occur naturally as expressions of love. The real miracle is the love that inspires them. In
this sense everything that comes from love is a miracle.
-- Marianne Williamson Effort is only effort when it begins to hurt.
-- Jose Ortega y Gasset Friendship is like money, easier made than kept.
-- Samuel Butler Marriage is like a mousetrap. Those on the outside are trying to get in. Those on the inside are trying to get out. Financial Services The theory used to be you marry an older man because they are more mature. The new theory is that men don't mature. So you might as well marry a younger one. All you need is love.
-- The Beatles, song title Gravitation can not be held responsible for people falling in love.
-- Albert Einstein Financial Services
We think caged birds sing, when indeed they cry.
-- John Webster For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-
knowing.
- Henry Louis Mencken There ought to be one day - just one - when there is open season on senators.
-- Will Rogers When nations grow old, the arts grow cold and commerce settles on every tree.
-- William Blake "Liberty means responsibility. That is why most men dread it." (George Bernard Shaw) Financial Services The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post.
-- George Bernard Shaw I could prove God statistically.
-- George Gallup Your every voter, as surely as your chief magistrate, exercises a public trust.
-- Grover Cleveland Financial Services
"The only things worth learning are the things you learn after you know it all." (Harry S. Truman) Love is like pi - natural, irrational, and very important.
-- Lisa Hoffman "The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." (Thomas Jefferson) Laywers, I suppose, were children once.
-- Charles Lamb Whenever you are asked if you can do a job, tell 'em, "Certainly, I can!" Then get busy and find
out how to do it.
-- Theodore Roosevelt Financial Services I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked
me in the cellar.
-- Anonymous All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream.
-- Edgar Allan Poe Give me chastity and continence, but not yet.
- Saint Augustine Financial Services
