Melksham Comedy Club - Amateur dramatics group. Location, past and future shows, member list, gallery and contact details.
When making public policy decisions about new technologies for the Government, I think one
should ask oneself which technologies would best strengthen the hand of a police state. Then, do
not allow >From the Far East I send you one single thought, one sole idea--written in red on every
beachhead form Australia to Tokyo--There is no substitute for victory!
-- General Douglas MacArthur Many a wife thinks her husband is the world's greatest lover. But she can never catch him at it. "I have great faith in fools; My friends call it self-confidence." (Edger Allen Poe) I didn't have time to write a short letter, so I wrote a long one instead.
-- Mark Twain Arts and Entertainment Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the
really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.
-- Mark Twain "We the people are the rightful masters of both Congress and the courts, not to overthrow the Constitution but to overthrow the men who pervert the Constitution." (Abraham Lincoln, 1809-65) Go on, get out. Last words are for fools who haven't said enough.
-- Karl Marx, dying words to his housekeeper Arts and Entertainment
Our elections are free - it's in the results where eventually we pay.
-- Bill Stern Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?
- H. M. Warner, founder of Warner Brothers, in 1927 Marriage: A ceremony in which rings are put on the finger of the lady and through the nose of the
gentleman.
-- Herbert Spencer A girl must marry for love and keep on marrying until she finds it.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor "College professors are the people who can't hack it in the real world." (William Thomas) Arts and Entertainment I do not have much patience with a thing of beauty that must be explained to be understood. If it
does need additional interpretation by someone other than the creator, then I question whether it
ha We must believe in free will, we have no choice.
-- Isaac B. Singer The true spirit of conversation consists in building on another man's observation, not overturning
it.
-- Edward Bulwer-Lytton Arts and Entertainment
"One should die proudly when it is no longer possible to live proudly." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) He who laughs, lasts.
-- Mary Pettibone Poole In great matters men show themselves as they wish to be seen; in small matters, as they are.
-- Gamaliel Bradford "The mark of our time is its revulsion against imposed patterns." (Marshall McLuhan) We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind
her stands his wife.
-- Groucho Marx Arts and Entertainment "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful committed citizens can change the world, indeed it is the only thing that ever has." (Margaret Mead, 1901-78) There is no future in any job. The future lies in the man who holds the job.
-- George Crane The IRS spends God knows how much of your tax money on these toll-free information hot lines
staffed by IRS employees, whose idea of a dynamite tax tip is that you should print neatly. If you
ask th Arts and Entertainment
The first clergyman was the first rascal who met the first fool.
-- Voltaire Youth is wasted on the young.
-- George Bernard Shaw "'Contrariwise,' continued Tweedledee, 'if it was so, it might be, and if it were so, it would be; but as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic!'" (Lewis Carroll, Through the Looking Glass) Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect.
-- Steven Wright There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as
though everything is a miracle.
-- Albert Einstein Arts and Entertainment The wise see knowledge and action as one; they see truly.
-- Bhagava Gita I can write better than anybody who can write faster, and I can write faster than anybody who can
write better.
- A. J. Liebling Some birds aren't meant to be caged, their feathers are just too bright. And when they fly away,
the part of you that knows it was a sin to lock them up, does rejoice. I guess I just miss my friend. Arts and Entertainment
Saying that Windows95 is equal to Macintosh is like finding a potato that looks like Jesus and
believing you've witnessed the second coming.
-- Guy Kawasaki We have only one person to blame, and that's each other.
-- Barry Beck, New York Ranger, on who started a fight furing a hockey game I'll sleep when I'm dead.
- Warren Zevon Like a prune, you are not getting any better looking, but you are getting sweeter.
-- N. D. Stice "When marrying, ask yourself this question: Do you believe that you will be able to converse well with this person into your old age? Everything else in marriage is transitory." (Friedrich Wilhelm Ni Arts and Entertainment There's a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore like an idiot.
-- Steven Wright There ought to be one day - just one - when there is open season on senators.
-- Will Rogers Whenever I'm caught between two evils, I take the one I've never tried.
-- Mae West Arts and Entertainment
There are only two things a child will share willingly communicable diseases and his mother's
age.
-- Modern Maturity "Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night." (Edger Allen Poe) When I have a kid, I wanna put him in one of those strollers for twins, then run around the mall
looking frantic.
-- Steven Wright Love, I find, is like singing. Everybody can do enough to satisfy themselves, though it may not
impress the neighbors as being very much.
-- Zora Neale Hurston The best reason I can think of for not running for President of the United States is that you have
to shave twice a day.
-- Adlai Stevenson Arts and Entertainment "Like as the waves make towards the pebbl'd shore, so do our minutes, hasten to their end." (William Shakespeare) The mathematician lives long and lives young; the wings of his soul do not early drop off, nor do
its pores become clogged with the earthy particles blown from the dusty highways of vulgar life.
-- An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have; the older she gets the more interested
he is in her.
-- Agatha Christie Arts and Entertainment
Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the situation.
--Anon. We are not retreating - we are advancing in another Direction.
- General Douglas MacArthur A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.
-- Robert Frost "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful committed citizens can change the world, indeed it is the only thing that ever has." (Margaret Mead, 1901-78) Democracy is a government where you can say what you think even if you don't think.
-- Anon. Arts and Entertainment "Hold the fort! I am coming!" (General William Tecumseh Sherman) The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.
-- Eleanor Roosevelt Why do grandparents and grandchildren get along so well? They have the same enemy-- the
mother.
-- Claudette Colbert Arts and Entertainment
The closer I'm bound in love to you, the closer I am to free.
-- Indigo Girls, song lyric The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people.
-- Lucille S. Harper "Hold a true friend with both your hands." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Joy is but the sign that creative emotion is fulfilling its purpose.
-- Charles Du Bos It's important to be open-minded, but not SO open-minded that your brains fall out.
-- Rick Radebaugh Arts and Entertainment My loathings are simple: stupidity, oppression, crime, cruelty, soft music.
-- Vladimir Nabokov A man can't get rich if he takes proper care of his family.
-- Navaho saying Love is shown in your deeds, not in your words.
-- Fr. Jerome Cummings Arts and Entertainment
"Posterity: you will never know how much it has cost my generation to preserve your freedom. I hope you will make good use of it." (John Quincy Adams) "Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Walk beside me and just be my friend." (Albert Camus) Whenever I'm caught between two evils, I take the one I've never tried.
-- Mae West Sex is like bridge: If you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand.
-- Charles Pierce History is more or less bunk.
-- Henry Ford Arts and Entertainment The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
-- Mark Twain No man in the world has more courage than the man who can stop after eating one peanut.
-- Channing Pollack When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are
legislators.
-- P. J. O'Rourke Arts and Entertainment
I don't want everyone to like me; I should think less of myself if some people did.
-- Henry James Absence diminishes small loves and increases great ones, as the wind blows out the candle and
blows up the bonfire.
-- François de La Rouchefoucauld Eternal boyhood is the dream of a depressing percentage of American males, and the locker
room is the temple where they worship arrested development.
-- Russell Baker If I were a girl, I'd despair. The supply of good women far exceeds that of the men who deserve
them.
-- Robert Graves Most convicted felons are just people who were not taken to museums or Broadway musicals as
children.
-- Libby Gelman-Waxner Arts and Entertainment He who laughs last has not yet heard the bad news.
-- Bertolt Brecht The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work.
- Emile Zola Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through
self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.
-- Helen Keller Arts and Entertainment
Courage: doing what you're afraid to do. There can be no courage unless you're scared.
-- Eddie Rickenbacker "Ninety percent of my salary I spent on booze and women ... and the other ten percent I wasted." (Tug McGraw, Major League Baseball pitcher) A true gentleman is one who is never unintentionally rude.
-- Oscar Wilde All that is gold does not glitter. Not all those who wander are lost;
-- J.R.R. Tolkein When I have a kid, I wanna put him in one of those strollers for twins, then run around the mall
looking frantic.
-- Steven Wright Arts and Entertainment He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.
- Sir Winston Churchill "The feminists used to say that chivalry and ladyhood were ways of keeping women down and preventing them from standing toe to toe with the guys. Now you've got a lot of women saying that if a guy is "I always thought a dog-lover was a dog who loved another dog." (James Thurber) Arts and Entertainment
