Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love.
-- Charlie Brown, character in "Peanuts" comic strip, created by Charles Schultz For most men life is a search for the proper manila envelope in which to get themselves filed.
-- Clifton Fadiman For most of history, Anonymous was a woman.
-- Virginia Woolf Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible. K Whenever a husband and wife begin to discuss their marriage, they are giving evidence at an
inquest.
-- H. L. Mencken Courage is the price that Love exacts for granting peace.
-- Amelia Earhart Man is a natural polygamist. He always has one woman leading him by the nose and another
hanging on to his coattails.
-- H. L. Mencken K
The Internet is so big, so powerful and pointless that for some people it is a complete substitute
for life.
-- Andrew Brown There is nothing better for the spirit or the body than a love affair. It elevates the thoughts and
flattens the stomachs.
-- Barbara Howar I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all
over it and put your name at the top.
-- English Professor, Ohio University The west wasn't won on salad.
-- ND Beef Council, billboard advertisement, 1990 To marry is to halve your rights and double your duties.
-- Arthur Schopenhauer K I take my wife everywhere I go. She always finds her way back.
-- Henny Youngman Love is like the measles. The older you get it, the worse the attack.
-- Mary Roberts Rhinehart I will try to follow the advice that a university president once gave a prospective commencement
speaker. "Think of yourself as the body at an Irish wake" he said. "They need you in order to have
th K
It is best to learn as we go, not go as we have learned.
-- Leslie Jeanne Sahler Music is the art of thinking with sounds.
-- Jules Combarieu Ninety percent of everything is crap.
-- Theodore Sturgeon "If you assume that there's no hope, you guarantee that there will be no hope. If you assume that there is an instinct for freedom, there are opportunities to change things, there's a chance for you t Change is not merely necessary to life, it is life.
-- Alvin Toffler K One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life: that word is love.
-- Sophocles Mathematics, rightly viewed, posses not only truth, but supreme beauty -- a beauty cold and
austere, like that of sculpture.
-- Bertrand Russell Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting.
- Karl Wallenda K
Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the
really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.
-- Mark Twain Since Eve ate the apple, much depends on dinner.
-- Lord Byron No man is good enough to govern another man without that other's consent.
-- Abraham Lincoln The eyes are not responsible when the mind does the seeing.
-- Publilius Syrus Marriage means commitment. Of course, so does insanity. K When one find's oneself in a hole of one's own making, it is a good time to examine the quality of
the workmanship.
-- John Renmerde I find television very educating. Every time sombody turns on the set, I go into the other room and
read a book.
-- Groucho Marx That's the way things come clear. All of a sudden. And then you realize how obvious they've been
all along.
-- Madeleine L'Engle K
"Ugliness is in a way superior to beauty because it lasts." (Serge Gainsbourg) One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do
what he was afraid he couldn't do.
-- Henry Ford To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it;
whenever you're right, shut up.
-- Ogden Nash Being in therapy is great. I spend an hour just talking about myself. It's kinda like being the guy on
a date.
-- Caroline Rhea "Your children are not your children. They are sons and daughters of life's longing for itself. They come through you but not from you. And though they are with you, they belong not to you. You may gi K Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.
-- Lily Tomlin "When even one American--who has done nothing wrong--is forced by fear to shut his mind and close his mouth--then all Americans are in peril." (Harry S. Truman) Those who do not want to imitate anything, produce nothing.
-- Salvador Dali K
If something is boring after two minutes, try it for four. If still boring, then eight. Then sixteen. Then thirty-two. Eventually one discovers that it is not boring at all." (John Cage) If you do not tell the truth about yourself you cannot tell it about other people.
-- Virginia Woolf People only see what they are prepared to see.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson Work is the curse of the drinking class.
-- Oscar Wilde Wind is to fire like distance is to love; it extinguishes the small and enflames the great.
-- Anonymous K If you find it in your heart to care for somebody else, you will have succeeded.
-- Maya Angelou "Friendship is born at the moment when one person says to another, 'What?! You too! Thought I was the only one.'" (Clive Staples Lewis) Correction: Instead of being arrested, as we stated, for kicking his wife down a flight of stairs and hurling a lighted kerosene lamp after her, the Rev. James P. Wellman died unmarried four years ago K
I drink no more than a sponge.
-- Francis Rabelais, Works. Book i. Chap. v. Is there life before death?
-- Belfast Graffito It is amazing at how small a price may the wedding ring be placed upon a worthless hand; but, by
the beauty of our law, what heaps of gold are indispensable to take it off!
-- Douglas Jerold, 1858 All marriages are happy--it's the living together afterward that causes all the problems. "I offer images; I conjure memories of freedom that can still be reached ... But, we can only open the doors. We can't drag people through. I can't free them unless they want to be free--more than any K Trust everybody, but cut the cards.
-- Finley Peter Dunne Diplomat: A man who can convince his wife she would look stout in a fur coat. Cricket is best described as organised loafing.
-- Anonymous British Radio Broadcaster, 1996 K
"No man means all he says, and yet very few say all they mean, for words are slippery and thought is viscous." (Henry B. Adams) "Great spirits have always found violent opposition from mediocrities. The latter cannot understand it when a man does not thoughtlessly submit to hereditary prejudices but honestly and courageously u "Deep down, no one really believes they have a right to live. But this death sentence generally stays tucked away, hidden beneath the difficulty of living. If that difficulty is removed from time to t There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.
- Frank Zappa Whenever a husband and wife begin to discuss their marriage, they are giving evidence at an
inquest.
-- H. L. Mencken K "Treat a man as he is, and he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he could be, and he will become what he should be." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) "I love Los Angeles. I love Hollywood. They're beautiful. Everybody's plastic, but I love plastic. I want to be plastic." (Andy Warhol, Holy Terror: Andy Warhol Close Up) We got to roll with the punches, play all of our hunches, make the best of whatever comes your
way. Forget that blind ambition, learn to trust your intuition -- plowing straight ahead, come what
may K
The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people.
-- Lucille S. Harper I shall return.
-- General Douglas MacArthur The theory used to be you marry an older man because they are more mature. The new theory is that men don't mature. So you might as well marry a younger one. Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-
proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe
is When looking back, usually I'm more sorry for the things I didn't do than for the things I shouldn't
have done.
-- Malcolm Forbes K What sets worlds in motion is the interplay of differences, their attractions and repulsions; life is
plurality, death is uniformity.
-- Octavio Paz "We have been the cowards lobbing cruise missiles from 2,000 miles away. That's cowardly. Staying in the airplane when it hits the building, say what you want about it, it's not cowardly." (Bill Mahe You never see a man walking down the street with a woman who has a little pot belly and a bald
spot.
-- Elayne Boosler K
"Nothing in education is so astonishing as the amount of ignorance it accumulates in the form of inert facts." (Henry B. Adams) "A man who tells lies, like me, merely hides the truth. But a man who tells half-lies has forgotten where he put it." (Claude Rains, as Mr. Dryden, Lawrence of Arabia, 1962) "One must still have chaos in oneself to be able to give birth to a dancing star." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Women want mediocre men, and men are working hard to become as mediocre as possible.
-- Margaret Mead I married the first man I ever kissed. When I tell this to my children they just about throw up.
-- Barbara Bush, first lady, 1989 K "Children today are tyrants. They contradict their parents, gobble their food, and tyrannize their teachers." (Socrates) To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance
- Oscar Wilde The trouble with children is that they are not returnable.
-- Quentin Crisp K
I support efforts to limit the terms of members of Congress, especially members of the House and
members of the Senate.
-- Dan Quayle, Former Vice-President "Better to be deprived of food for three days than tea for one." (Chinese Proverb) Thanksgiving is so called because we are all so thankful that it only comes once a year.
-- P. J. O'Rourke If you want anything done well, do it yourself. This is why most people laugh at their own jokes.
-- Bob Edwards "Do not go gentle into that good night. Old age should burn and rave at close of day. Rage, rage against the dying of the light." (Dylan Thomas) K Executive ability is deciding quickly and getting someone else to do the work.
-- John G. Pollard I don't think I'll get married again. I'll just find a woman I don't like and give her a house.
-- Lewis Grizzard "Against stupidity the very gods themselves contend in vain." (Johann Christian Friedrich von Schiller, 1759-1805, The Maid of Orleans. Act iii. Sc. 6.) K
