Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well.
-- Josh Billings The west wasn't won on salad.
-- ND Beef Council, billboard advertisement, 1990 Having a family is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain.
-- Martin Mull Black holes are where God divided by zero.
- Steven Wright What is life? It is the flash of a firefly in the night. It is the breath of a buffalo in the wintertime. It is
the little shadow which runs across the grass and loses itself in the sunset.
-- Crowf W Learn to laugh at your troubles and you'll never run out of things to laugh at.
-- Lyn Karol A conclusion is the place where you got tired thinking.
-- Martin H. Fischer It takes a great deal of history to produce a little literature.
-- Henry James W
An undefined problem has an infinite number of solutions.
-- Robert A. Humphrey A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.
- John D. Rockefeller Don't ever take a fence down until you know why it was put up.
-- Robert Frost "Do not do unto others as you expect they should do unto you. Their tastes may not be the same." (George Bernard Shaw) Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through
self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.
-- Helen Keller W "My daughter has never forgiven me. for what, I don't know, because for years, she won't speak to me. She blackens my name in the press and makes me think abortion is an excellent idea." (Klaus Kinsk "Boredom is a vital problem for the moralist, since at least half the sins of mankind are caused by the fear of it." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) There's nothing remarkable about it. All one has to do is hit the right keys at the right time and the
instrument plays itself.
-- Johann Sebastian Bach W
We make our friends; we make our enemies; but God makes our next door neighbour.
-- G. K. Chesterton We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind
her stands his wife.
-- Groucho Marx It is best to learn as we go, not go as we have learned.
-- Leslie Jeanne Sahler The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of
mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you.
-- Rita Mae Brown "Small minds discuss people, average minds discuss events, great minds discuss ideas." (Anonymous) W The possibility that we may fail in the struggle ought not to deter us from the support of a cause
we believe to be just.
-- Abraham Lincoln Statistics have shown that mortality increases perceptibly in the military during wartime.
-- Alphonse Allais The Church is an organism that grows best in an alien society.
-- C. Stacey Woods W
"I owe much to my friends; but, all things considered, it strikes me that I owe even more to my enemies. The real person springs life under a sting even better than under a caress." (André Gide) "Love is always a stranger in the house of avarice." (Andreas Capellanus) "No one wants a good education. Everyone wants a good degree." (Lee Rudolph) Dishonor will not trouble me, once I am dead.
-- Euripides Life is the flower for which love is the honey.
-- Victor Hugo W "I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members." (Groucho Marx) If we were not all so interested in ourselves, life would be so uninteresting that none of us would
be able to endure it.
-- Schopenhauer "Against stupidity the very gods themselves contend in vain." (Johann Christian Friedrich von Schiller, 1759-1805, The Maid of Orleans. Act iii. Sc. 6.) W
The love we give away is the only love we keep.
-- Elbert Hubbard If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there and worrying. It's the worry
that gets you, not the loss of sleep.
-- Dale Carnegie Never judge someone by who he's in love with; judge him by his friends. People fall in love with
the most appalling people. Take a cool, appraising glance at his pals.
-- Cynthia Heimel I should have no objection to a repetition of the same life from its beginning, only asking the
advantages authors have in a second edition to correct some faults of the first.
-- Benjamin Franklin "To be great is to be misunderstood." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) W In the early sixties, we were strong, we were virulent...
-- John Connally, Secretary of Treasury under Richard Nixon, in an early 70s speech, as reported
in a contemporary "American Scholar" We are all here for a spell; get all the good laughs you can.
-- Will Rogers We are not in a position in which we have nothing to work with. We already have capacities,
talents, direction, missions, callings.
-- Abraham Maslow W
Never be unfaithful to a lover, except with your wife. -- PJ O'Rourke It is best to learn as we go, not go as we have learned.
-- Leslie Jeanne Sahler "See - one side of my face is gentle and kind, incapable of anything but love of my fellow man. The other side, the other profile, is cruel and predatory and evil, incapable of anything but lusts and "Whenever a friend succeeds, a little something in me dies." (Gore Vidal) A man who has never made a woman angry is a failure in life.
-- Christopher Morley W Courage is the price that Love exacts for granting peace.
-- Amelia Earhart No, that is the great fallacy; the wisdom of old men. They do not grow wise. They grow careful." (Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell To Arms) The less a man thinks or knows about his virtues, the better we like him.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson W
"A thing of beauty is a joy forever." (John Keats) Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe He who laughs last is generally the last to get the joke.
-- Terry Cohen By all means marry. If you get a good wife you will become happy, and if you get a bad one you
will become a philosopher.
-- Socrates Goodbye, Everybody!
-- Hart Crane, poet, who committed suicide by jumping overboard during a steamship voyage. W This novel is not to be tossed lightly aside, but hurled with great force.
-- Dorothy Parker Time is at once the most valuable and most perishable of all our possessions.
-- John Randolph Genius is an African who dreams up snow.
-- Vladimir Nabokov W
"I couldn't find the sports car of my dreams, so I built it myself." (Dr. Ferdinand Porsche) Washing one's hands of the conflict between the powerful and the powerless means to side with
the powerful, not to be neutral.
-- Paulo Freire No one finds life worth living; he must make it worth living.
-- Anon. Victory belongs to the most persevering.
-- Napoleon Bonaparte "Sometimes I think it's another sign of the sad necessity of our crowded, lonely lives, an urgent hopeless reaching out to touch something real, a deep hunger for something authentic when everything s W "The evil that is in the world almost always comes of ignorance, and good intentions may do as much harm as malevolence if they lack understanding." (Albert Camus) "And on the seventh day, God stepped back and said 'There is my creation, perfect in every way ... oh, damn it, I left pot all over the place. Now they'll think I want them to smoke it. Now I have to Computers will not be perfected until they can compute how much more than the estimate the job
will cost.
-- Anon W
Minds are like parachutes - they only function when open.
-- Thomas Dewar "It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so." (Mark Twain) Your every voter, as surely as your chief magistrate, exercises a public trust.
-- Grover Cleveland Every man knows his follies and often they are the most interesting thing he has got.
-- Josh Billings The great advantage of being in a rut is that when one is in a rut, one knows exactly where one
is.
-- Arnold Bennett W Life is like a movie--since there aren't any commercial breaks, you have to get up and go to the
bathroom in the middle of it.
-- Nick Mirov Marriage is a trip between Niagara Falls and Reno. It makes no difference who you vote for - the two parties are really one party representing four
percent of the people.
-- Gore Vidal W
I think we are drawn to dogs because they are the uninhibited creatures we might be if we weren't
certain we knew better.
-- George Bird Evans Now join your hands, and with your hands your hearts.
-- William Shakespeare, King Henry the Sixth The instinct of nearly all societies is to lock up anybody who is truly free. First, society begins by
trying to beat you up. If this fails, they try to poison you. If this fails too, the finish by l I regret that I have but one life to give for my country.
-- Nathan Hale When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I'm beginning to believe it.
-- Clarence Darrow W Marry in haste, repent in leisure.
-- Tilney Be tolerant of the human race. Your whole family belongs to it -- and some of your spouse's
family does too.
-- Anonymous In the late 1600s the finest instruments originated from three rural families whose workshops
were side by side in the Italian village of Cremona. First were the Amatis, and outside their shop
hung W
I date this girl for two years--and then the nagging starts: "I wanna know your name."
-- Mike Binder I have always dressed according to certain Basic Guy Fashion Rules, including:
* Both of your socks should always be the same color
* Or they should at least both be fairly dark
-- Dave Barry You can always amend a big plan, but you can never expand a little one. I don't believe in little
plans. I believe in plans big enough to meet a situation which we can't possibly foresee now.
-- Ha Washing one's hands of the conflict between the powerful and the powerless means to side with
the powerful, not to be neutral.
-- Paulo Freire Trust, but verify.
-- Ronald Reagan W Value your words. Each one may be the last.
-- Stanislaw J. Lec Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.
-- Frank L. Visco, How to Write Good As for the virtuous poor, one can pity them, of course, but one cannot possibly admire them.
-- Oscar Wilde W
