Joyce Estate Agents - Agents with a number of branches in the Armagh area. Advice on buying or selling a home, list of currently available properties and staff details.
Craigavon and Armagh Rural Development - Responsible for administering the LEADER+ Programme within the rural areas of Armagh City and District Council and Craigavon Borough Council. Includes news and information on funding available.
RA Irwin - Manufacturer of Jacquard woven, printed and non-woven textiles for use in mattresses, furniture manufacture and window blinds. Based in Portadown and Donaghcloney.
They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist---
-- John B. Sedgwick, general, dying words, 1864 Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars
-- Les Brown Logic is in the eye of the logician.
- Gloria Steinem Marry not a tennis player. For love means nothing to them. "In literary criticism the critic has no choice but to make over the victim of his attention into something the size and shape of himself." (John Steinbeck, Travels With Charley) Business and Economy Eternal boyhood is the dream of a depressing percentage of American males, and the locker
room is the temple where they worship arrested development.
-- Russell Baker I don't think I'll get married again. I'll just find a woman I don't like and give her a house.
-- Lewis Grizzard Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country.
-- Marion Barry, Mayor, Washington, D.C. Business and Economy
I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way
around Chinatown.
-- Woody Allen Giving a man space is like giving a dog a computer: the chances are he will not use it wisely.
-- Bette-Jane Raphael Natural ability without education has more often attained to glory and virtue than education
without natural ability.
Cicero (106 BC - 43 BC) Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to
do...but she's certain that her boy will never get as great a wife as his father did.
-- Anonymous Don't be afraid your life will end; be afraid that it will never begin.
-- Grace Hansen Business and Economy The great art of life is sensation, to feel that we exist, even in pain.
-- Lord Byron Joy is but the sign that creative emotion is fulfilling its purpose.
-- Charles Du Bos I have been attacked by Rush Limbaugh on the air, an experience somewhat akin to being
gummed by a newt. It doesn't actually hurt, but it leaves you with slimy stuff on your ankle.
-- Molly Ivins Business and Economy
Hell is a half-filled auditorium.
-- Robert Frost The best defense is a good offense.
-- Anonymous "Our lives are repetitious shams--every single day a simulacrum of the previous day. So for Man, he is out to pepper his daily activities with different things--he's fighting against boredom." (Matth We haven't the money, so we've got to think.
-- Lord Rutherford "Take your life in your own hands, and what happens? A terrible thing: no one to blame." (Erica Jong) Business and Economy The possibility that we may fail in the struggle ought not to deter us from the support of a cause
we believe to be just.
-- Abraham Lincoln "In literary criticism the critic has no choice but to make over the victim of his attention into something the size and shape of himself." (John Steinbeck, Travels With Charley) "Failure is not an option!" (Ed Harris, as Gene Kranz, Apollo 13) Business and Economy
My initial response was to sue her for defamation of character, but then I realized that I had no
character.
-- Charles Barkley, on hearing Tonya Harding proclaim herself "the Charles Barkley of fig We have children because we want immortality and this is the most reliable way of getting it.
-- Woodrow Wyatt Love is an emotion that is based on an opinion of women that is impossible for those who have
had any experience with them.
-- H. L. Mencken My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a
philosopher.
- Socrates "Nobody minds having what is too good for them." (Jane Austen) Business and Economy Never judge someone by who he's in love with; judge him by his friends. People fall in love with
the most appalling people. Take a cool, appraising glance at his pals.
-- Cynthia Heimel Marriage is a lottery in which men stake their liberty and women their happiness.
-- Madame de Rieux If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him.
-- Voltaire Business and Economy
We didn't send you to Washington to make intelligent decisions. We sent you to represent us.
-- Kent York, Baptist minister to US Rep. Bill Sarpalius After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music.
-- Aldous Huxley Husbands are awkward things to deal with; even keeping them in hot water will not make them
tender.
-- Mary Buckley Fine art and pizza delivery: what we do falls neatly in between.
-- David Letterman "Like as the waves make towards the pebbl'd shore, so do our minutes, hasten to their end." (William Shakespeare) Business and Economy Neither fire nor wind, birth nor death can erase our good deeds.
-- Buddha I have a daughter who goes to SMU. She could've gone to UCLA here in California, but it's one
more letter she'd have to remember.
-- Shecky Greene Having a family is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain.
-- Martin Mull Business and Economy
Ideas are like rabbits. You get a couple, learn how to handle them, and pretty soon you have a
dozen.
-- John Steinbeck A Sunday school is a prison in which children do penance for the evil conscience of their parents.
-- H. L. Mencken Each has his past shut in him like the leaves of a book known to him by heart and his friends can
only read the title.
-- Virginia Woolf The promises of maniacs, like those of women, are not safely relied upon.
-- Joseph Heller, God Knows We all agree that your theory is crazy, but is it crazy enough?
- Niels Bohr Business and Economy "A man of genius makes no mistakes; his errors are volitional and are the portals of discovery." (James Joyce) "If you believe everything you read, you better not read." (Japanese Proverb) The gods too are fond of a joke.
- Aristotle Business and Economy
The Republicans have a new healthcare proposal: Just say NO to illness!
-- Mark Russell A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.
- Helen Rowland Every man knows his follies and often they are the most interesting thing he has got.
-- Josh Billings People need loving the most when they deserve it the least.
-- John Harrigan There's nothing remarkable about it. All one has to do is hit the right keys at the right time and the
instrument plays itself.
-- Johann Sebastian Bach Business and Economy I didn't have time to write a short letter, so I wrote a long one instead.
-- Mark Twain You've achieved success in your field when you don't know whether what you're doing is work or
play.
-- WARREN BEATTY I do not see the EEC as a great love affair. It is more like nine desperate middle-ages couples with failing marriages meeting at a Brussels hotel for a group grope. -- Tynan Business and Economy
Great ability develops and reveals itself increasingly with every new assignment. Baltasar
Gracian What is the answer? In that case, what is the question?
-- Gertrude Stein, dying words All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That is his.
-- Oscar Wilde "Frank and explicit; that is the right line to take when you wish to conceal your own mind and to confuse the minds of others." (Benjamin Disraeli, Sybil) Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.
-- T. S. Eliot Business and Economy "The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom." (William Blake) Thank heaven. A bachelor's life is no life for a single man.
-- Samuel Goldwyn, immigrant-turned-famous-movie-producer, when told his son was getting
married The better part of one's life consists of his friendships.
-- Abraham Lincoln Business and Economy
Friends need not agree in everything or go always together, or have no comparable other
friendships of the same intimacy. On the contrary, in friendship union is more about ideal things:
and in that I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor To love someone deeply gives you strength. Being loved by someone deeply gives you courage.
-- Lao Tzu The whole art of teaching is only the art of awakening the natural curiosity of young minds for the
purpose of satisfying it afterwards.
-- Anatole France It is dangerous for a national candidate to say things that people might remember.
-- Eugene McCarthy Business and Economy The principle of give and take is the principle of diplomacy - give one and take ten.
-- Mark Twain Not only is the universe stranger than we imagine, it is stranger than we can imagine.
Sir Arthur Eddington (1882 - 1944) Now join your hands, and with your hands your hearts.
-- William Shakespeare, King Henry the Sixth Business and Economy
Acting is the most minor of gifts and not a very high-class way to earn a living. After all, Shirley
Temple could do it at the age of four.
-- Katharine Hepburn It is never too late to be what you might have been.
-- George Eliot I tried a mail order bride, once, but she was damaged in the mail, and I had to return the unused part for my full refund. Now comes the mystery.
-- Henry Ward Beecher, dying words, March 8, 1887 The Bible contains six admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to
heterosexuals. That doesn't mean that God doesn't love heterosexuals. It's just that they need
more supervision.
-- Lynn Business and Economy Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech.
- Martin Fraquhar Tupper Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is most important that you do it.
-- Gandhi blah "An engaged woman is always more agreeable than a disengaged. She is satisfied with herself. Her cares are over, and she feels that she may exert all her powers of pleasing without suspicion." ( Business and Economy
Never express yourself more clearly than you are able to think.
-- Niels Bohr "There are no uninteresting things, only uninteresting people." (Gilbert Keith Chesterton) A man sits with a pretty girl for an hour, it seems like a minute. He sits on a hot stove for a
minute, it's longer than any hour. That is relativity.
-- Albert Einstein The secret of success is to know something nobody else knows.
- Aristotle Onassis People, like nails, lose their effectiveness when they lose direction and begin to bend.
-- Walter Savage Landor Business and Economy The most exciting attractions are between two opposites that never meet.
-- Andy Warhol If you want a place in the sun, you've got to put up with a few blisters.
-- Abigail Van Buren It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.
-- Anonymous Business and Economy
