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"The concerned investment banker is the one who blows the horn on his Mercedes as he drives through a red light." (Anonymous) Wit is educated insolence.
- Aristotle The best way to get husbands to do something is to suggest that perhaps they are too old to do it.
-- Shirley MacLaine Age does not make us childish, as some say; it finds us true children.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe He would make a lovely corpse.
- Charles Dickens Dollingstown "Talent does what it can; genius does what it must." (Edward Robert Bulwer-Lytton) When we treat man as he is, we make him worse than he is; when we treat him as if he already
were what he potentially could be, we make him what he should be.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Usenet is like a herd of performing elephants with diarrhea -- massive, difficult to redirect, awe-
inspiring, entertaining, and a source of mind-boggling amounts of excrement when you least
expect i Dollingstown
Republican boys date Democratic girls. They plan to marry Republican girls, but feel they're
entitled to a little fun first.
-- Anonymous Conservatives are not necessarily stupid, but most stupid people are conservatives.
-- John Stuart Mill The longer I live the more I see that I am never wrong about anything, and that all the pains that I
have so humbly taken to verify my notions have only wasted my time.
-- George Bernard Shaw The voice of the intellect is a soft one, but it does not rest till it has gained a hearing.
-- Sigmund Freud "I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it." (Thomas Jefferson, to Archibald Stuart, 1791) Dollingstown "A dress makes no sense unless it inspires men to take it off of you." (Francois Sagan) The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.
-- Albert Einstein Logic is in the eye of the logician.
- Gloria Steinem Dollingstown
Being in therapy is great. I spend an hour just talking about myself. It's kinda like being the guy on
a date.
-- Caroline Rhea Genius has somewhat of the infantine; But of the childish not a touch or taint.
-- Robert Browning "Workers of the world unite; you have nothing to lose but your chains." (Karl Marx) A man's ethical behavior should be based effectually on sympathy, education, and social ties; no
religious basis is necessary. Man would indeed be in a poor way if he had to be restrained by fear
of The society of women is the element of good manners.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Dollingstown "Any intelligent woman who reads the marriage contract, and then goes into it, deserves all the consequences." (Isadora Duncan) "It is neccessary to have wished for death in order to know how good it is to live." (Alexander Dumas) If a man does his best, what else is there?
- General George S. Patton Dollingstown
It is better to be looked over than overlooked.
-- Mae West There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well written or badly written.
-- Oscar Wilde A man can do what he wants, but not want what he wants.
-- Arthur Schoperhauer The telephone company is urging people to *please* not use the telephone unless it is absolutely
necessary in order to keep the lines open for emergency personnel. We'll be right back after this
bre If the government wants people to respect the law, it should set a better example.
-- Anon. Dollingstown then the world 's mine oyster
-- William Shakespeare, The Merry Wives of Windsor I am beginning to suspect all elaborate and special systems of education. They seem to me to be
built upon the supposition that every child is a kind of idiot who must be taught to think.
-- Anne S All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream.
-- Edgar Allan Poe Dollingstown
"There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered." (Nelson Mandela, A Long Walk to Freedom) Education is what survives when what has been learned has been forgotten.
-- B.F. Skinner "He who can, does. He who cannot, teaches." (George Bernard Shaw) "To live is to dream and to die is to awaken." (Anonymous) "One pretty good definition of college is that it's a place where people are made to read difficult books." (Jonathan Franzen) Dollingstown Here's to you and here's to me,
and I hope we never disagree.
But, if that should ever be,
to HELL with you, here's to ME!
-- Anonymous "I'll endorse with my name any of the following; clothing AC-DC, cigarettes, small tapes, sound equipment, ROCK N' ROLL RECORDS, anything, film, and film equipment, Food, Helium, Whips, MONEY!!" (And The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon, but that we wait so long to begin it.
-- Anonymous Dollingstown
Whining is not only graceless, but can be dangerous. It can alert a brute that a victim is in the
neighborhood.
-- Maya Angelou We do not remember days; we remember moments.
-- Anonymous Saying that men talk about baseball in order to avoid talking about their feelings is the same as
saying that women talk about their feelings in order to avoid talking about baseball.
-- Deborah Tan Many a man in love with a dimple makes the mistake of marrying the whole girl.
-- Stephen Leacock Hey, you can't fight in here! This is the war room!
-- Dr. Strangelove Dollingstown Imagine if birds were tickled by feathers. You'd see a flock of birds come by, laughing hysterically!
-- Steven Wright In endowing us with memory, nature has revealed to us a truth utterly unimaginable to the
unreflective creation, the truth of immortality....The most ideal human passion is love, which is
also the m A scholar who cherishes the love of comfort is not fit to be deemed a scholar.
- Lao-Tzu Dollingstown
Love is a perky elf dancing a merry little jig and then suddenly he turns on you with a miniature
machine gun.
-- Matt Groening, Love is Hell Honorable, adj. Afflicted with an impediment in one's reach. In legislative bodies, it is customary
to mention all members as honorable; as, ``the honorable gentleman is a scurvy cur.'
-- Bierce, A The advantage of a classical education is that it enables you to despise the wealth which it
prevents you from achieving.
-- Russell Green The difference between literature and journalism is that journalism is unreadable and literature is
not read.
-- Oscar Wilde Very little is known of the Canadian country since it is rarely visited by anyone but the Queen and
illiterate sport fishermen.
-- P. J. O'Rourke Dollingstown "The proper office of a friend is to side with you when you are wrong. Nearly anybody will side with you when you are right." (Mark Twain) The child is the father of the man.
-- William Wordsworth There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as
though everything is a miracle.
- Albert Einstein Dollingstown
We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out.
-- Decca Recording Company, rejecting the Beatles, 1962 "The purpose of Compulsory Education is to deprive the common people of their commonsense." (Gilbert Keith Chesterton) There is no course of life so weak and sottish as that which is managed by order, method, and
discipline.
-- Michel de Montaigne There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.
- Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977 The only one of your children who does not grow up and move away is your husband. Dollingstown If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?
- Will Rogers Trust everybody, but cut the cards.
-- Finley Peter Dunne In the halls of justice, the only justice is in the halls.
-- Lenny Bruce Dollingstown
"To forget one's purpose is the commonest form of stupidity." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Children are a poor man's riches.
-- English proverb I tried a mail order bride, once, but she was damaged in the mail, and I had to return the unused part for my full refund. If all these sweet young things were laid end to end, I wouldn't be the slightest bit surprised.
-- Dorothy Parker The lover knows much more about absolute good and universal beauty than any logician or
theologian, unless the latter, too, be lovers in disguise.
-- George Santayana Dollingstown The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when
we created them.
- Albert Einstein Love is the flower of life, and blossoms unexpectedly and without law, and must be plucked
where it is found, and enjoyed for the brief hour of its duration.
-- D. H. Lawrence To die for an idea is to set a rather high price on conjecture.
-- Anatole France Dollingstown
"Avoid providing material for the drama that is always stretched tight between parents and children; it uses up much of the children's strength and wastes the love of the elders, which acts and warms One ought, every day at least, to hear a little song, read a good poem, see a fine picture and, if
possible, speak a few reasonable words.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Teach a parrot the terms "supply and demand" and you've got an economist.
-- Thomas Carlyle "I'm so insane, I voted for Eisenhower."
"Oh yeah, well I'm so insane, I voted for Eisenhower TWICE!"
-- Ken Kesey from "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" We make our friends; we make our enemies; but God makes our next door neighbour.
-- G. K. Chesterton Dollingstown Ah Mozart! He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.
-- Victor Borge It makes no difference who you vote for - the two parties are really one party representing four
percent of the people.
-- Gore Vidal When ideas fail, words come in very handy.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Dollingstown
"To make a living, craftiness is better than learnedness." (Pierre-Augustin de Beaumarchais) I take my wife everywhere I go. She always finds her way back.
-- Henny Youngman "What a curious phenomenon it is that you can get men to die for the liberty of the world who will not make the little sacrifice that is needed to free themselves from their own individual bondage." "Vegiburgers are wrong." (Mike Kaup) If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me.
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth Dollingstown Truth must necessarily be stranger than fiction, for fiction is the creation of the human mind and
therefore congenial to it.
-- G. K. Chesterton I never miss a chance to have sex or appear on television.
-- Gore Vidal Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to
take away.
- Antoine de Saint Exupery Dollingstown
