Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the
source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity,
ign "The feminists used to say that chivalry and ladyhood were ways of keeping women down and preventing them from standing toe to toe with the guys. Now you've got a lot of women saying that if a guy is "We always get bored with those whom we bore." (François VI Duke (duc) de La Rochefoucauld, 1616-80) "I had discovered that a person does not have to be this or be that or be anything, not even oneself. One is free." (Walker Percy, The Moviegoer) Gentlemen, it is better to have died a small boy than to fumble this football.
-- John Heisman Animals "If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way." (Mark Twain) Football incorporates the two worst elements of American society: violence punctuated by
committee meetings.
-- George F. Will, journalist, political commentator, 1994 Courage is the price that Love exacts for granting peace.
-- Amelia Earhart Animals
When yer in a funk, people in love are a royal pain in the patookus.
-- Portnoy, character in "Outland," comic strip by Berkely Breathed They have come up with a perfect understanding. He won't try to run her life, and he won't try to
run his, either.
-- Anonymous What is life? It is the flash of a firefly in the night. It is the breath of a buffalo in the wintertime. It is
the little shadow which runs across the grass and loses itself in the sunset.
-- Crow Having once decided to achieve a certain task, achieve it at all costs of tedium and distaste. The
gain in self-confidence of having accomplished a tiresome labor is immense.
-- Thomas Arnold Bennet Husband: a man who buys his football tickets four months in advance and waits until December 24 to do his Christmas shopping. Animals "If you want to make enemies, try to change something." (Woodrow Wilson, 28th US president, 1856-1924) We love because it's the only true adventure.
-- Nikki Giovanni There is a courtesy of the heart; it is allied to love. From it springs the purest courtesy in the
outward behavior.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Animals
Insurance is like marriage. You pay, pay, pay, and you never get anything back.
-- Al Bundy, character on "Married with Children," U.S. television show The church must be the critic and guide of the state, and never its tool.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. There are many things worth living for, there are a few things worth dying for, but there is nothing
worth killing for.
-- Tom Robbins "The brighter you are, the more you have to learn." (Don Herold) "A woman may very well form a friendship with a man, but for this to endure, it must be assisted by a little physical antipathy." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Animals "The key to wisdom is knowing all the right questions." (John A. Simone Jr.) Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
- Oscar Wilde It is a product of Einstein's genius -- taking a commonplace observation, combining it with some
simple imaginary experiments, and arriving at a revolutionary conclusion.
-- Clifford M. Wills, 1986 Animals
Having a family is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain.
-- Martin Mull "You know what charm is: a way of getting the answer yes without having asked any clear question." (Albert Camus, The Fall) Politics is for people who have a passion for changing life but lack a passion for living it.
-- Tom Robbins The full use of your powers along lines of excellence.
- definition of happiness by John F. Kennedy In the early sixties, we were strong, we were virulent...
-- John Connally, Secretary of Treasury under Richard Nixon, in an early 70s speech, as reported
in a contemporary "American Scholar" Animals "There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered." (Nelson Mandela, A Long Walk to Freedom) If excessive smoking actually plays a role in the production of lung cancer, it seems to be a minor
one.
-- Dr. W.C. Heuper of the National Cancer Institute, as quoted in the New York Times on Apri Washing one's hands of the conflict between the powerful and the powerless means to side with
the powerful, not to be neutral.
-- Paulo Freire Animals
Husbands are awkward things to deal with; even keeping them in hot water will not make them
tender.
-- Mary Buckley "I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter." (Blaise Pascal) Parents are the bones upon which children sharpen their teeth.
-- Peter Ustinov The paradox is really the pathos of intellectual life and just as only great souls are exposed to
passions it is only the great thinker who is exposed to what I call paradoxes, which are . . .
grand "Is life not a thousand times too short for us to bore ourselves?" (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Animals "A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools." (Douglas Adams) "If liberty and equality, as is thought by some, are chiefly to be found in democracy, they will be best attained when all persons alike share in government to the utmost." (Aristotle) Honor's a good brooch to wear in a man's hat at all times.
-- Jonson, Ben Animals
We have to keep trying things we're not sure we can pull off. If we just do the things we know we
can do... you don't grow as much. You gotta take those chances on making those big mistakes.
-- Cybi Giving a man space is like giving a dog a computer: the chances are he will not use it wisely.
-- Bette-Jane Raphael The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes Every act of creation is first an act of destruction.
-- Pablo Picasso Of course, it is very important to be sober when you take an exam. Many worthwile careers in the
street-cleansing, fruit-picking and subway-guitar-playing industries have been founded on a lack
of u Animals Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large
organizations habitually engage in only because they cannot actually masturbate.
-- Dave Barry Each of us has a spark of life inside us, and our highest endeavor ought to be to set off that spark
in one another.
-- Kenny Ausubel I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me. Animals
"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." (Albert Einstein) True, we love life, not because we are used to living, but because we are used to loving. There is
always some madness in love, but there is also always some reason in madness.
-- Friedrich Nietzsch Whenever I dwell for any length of time on my own shortcomings, they gradually begin to seem
mild harmless, rather engaging little things, not at all like the staring defects in other people's
chara "In order to preserve your self-respect, it is sometimes necessary to lie and cheat." (Robert Byrne) When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I'm beginning to believe it.
-- Clarence Darrow Animals After finding no qualified candidates for the position of principal, the school board is extremely
pleased to announce the appointment of David Steele to the post.
-- Philip Streifer, Superintendent I don't know if God exists, but it would be better for His reputation if He didn't.
-- Jules Renard The covers of this book are too far apart.
-- Ambrose Bierce Animals
A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.
-- Walter Winchell Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.
-- Carl Gustav Jung A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.
-- Gloria Steinem The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
-- Mark Twain When Baby's cries grew hard to bear I popped him in the Frigidaire. I never would have done so if
I'd known that he'd be frozen stiff. My wife said, "George, I'm so unhappy! Our darling's now
comple Animals The closer I'm bound in love to you, the closer I am to free.
-- Indigo Girls, song lyric "If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library." (Frank Zappa) I must follow the people. Am I not their leader?
-- Benjamin Disraeli Animals
"Video games are bad for you? That's what they said about rock 'n roll." (Shigeru Miyamoto, game designer for Nintendo) My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a
philosopher.
- Socrates I do not have much patience with a thing of beauty that must be explained to be understood. If it
does need additional interpretation by someone other than the creator, then I question whether it
ha Never apologize for showing feeling. When you do so you apologize for truth.
-- Benjamin Disraeli The real questions are the ones that obtrude upon your consciousness whether you like it or not,
the ones that make your mind start vibrating like a jackhammer, the ones that you 'come to terms
with Animals The more faithfully you listen to the voices within you, the better you will hear what is sounding
outside.
-- Dag Hammarskjold Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after.
-- Anne Morrow Lindbergh Assassins!
-- Arturo Toscanini, to his orchestra Animals
Generations to come will find it difficult to believe that a man such as Gandhi ever walked the
face of this earth.
-- Albert Einstein No one can earn a million dollars honestly.
- William Jennings Bryan There is no reason for any individual to have a computer in his home.
-- Kenneth H. Olson, President of DEC, Convention of the World Future Society, 1977 An eye for an eye only leads to more blindness.
-- Margaret Atwood I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now.... This is an ex-parrot.
-- John Cleese, Monty Python, British comedy television show Animals The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other
is ready.
-- Henry David Thoreau The better part of one's life consists of his friendships.
-- Abraham Lincoln "Dreams are the touchstones of our personality." (Henry David Thoreau) Animals
"The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn." (David Russell) "The greater the artist, the greater the doubt. Perfect confidence is granted to the less talented as a consolation prize." (Robert Hughes) Humanity has advanced, when it has advanced, not because it has been sober, responsible, and
cautious, but because it has been playful, rebellious, and immature.
-- Tom Robbins "What you do speaks so loudly that I cannot hear what you say." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.
-- Mae West Animals True friendship can afford true knowledge. It does not depend on darkness and ignorance.
-- Henry David Thoreau At every crossroads on the path that leads to the future, tradition has placed 10,000 men to guard
the past.
-- Maurice Maeterlink "May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house." (George Carlin) Animals
