Irish Ladies' Golf Union (ILGU) - Offers information regarding clubs, fixtures, players and golfing news, as well as tips on how to improve.
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Marriage is a lottery in which men stake their liberty and women their happiness.
-- Madame de Rieux "So little done, so much to do." (Cecil Rhodes) "The man who never made a mistake never made anything." (Derek Longdon, Tongariro Power Development, Turangi, New Zealand) "A true friend stabs you in the front." (Oscar Wilde) "It is a curious thing that God learned Greek when he wished to turn author--and that he did not learn it better." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Golf Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to
do...but she's certain that her boy will never get as great a wife as his father did.
-- Anonymous Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has not heart; and any man who is over 30, and is
not a conservative, has no brains.
-- Winston Churchill If ever I get married again it would have to be under an anaesthetic.
-- Marie Tonkin Golf
If we knew what we were doing, it wouldn't be called research, would it?
-- Albert Einstein Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?
- H. M. Warner, founder of Warner Brothers, in 1927 In every man's heart there is a secret nerve that answers to the vibrations of beauty.
-- Christopher Morley If God had meant us to vote, He would have given us candidates.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.
-- T. S. Eliot Golf When you see what some girls marry, you realize how they must hate to work for a living.
-- Helen Rowland They had a dispute about a night out with the boys. But he finally decided to let her go.
-- Anonymous The fantasy which serves as a support for the figure of the Stalinist Communist is therefore
exactly the same as the fantasy which is at work in the Tom and Jerry cartoons.
-- Slavoj Zizek Golf
To write a good love letter, you ought to begin without knowing what you mean to say, and to
finish without knowing what you have written.
-- Jean Jacques Rousseau You've achieved success in your field when you don't know whether what you're doing is work or
play.
-- WARREN BEATTY "There is only one thing more painful than learning from experience and that is not learning from experience." (Archibald McLeish) As always, victory finds a hundred fathers but defeat is an orphan.
-- Count Galeazzo Ciano, The Ciano Diaries Bachelor: the only man who has never told his wife a lie. Golf "Careful?! Was my mother careful when she stabbed me in the heart with a coat hanger while I was still in the womb?" (Trey Parker) He who laughs last didn't get it.
-- Helen Giangregorio The advice your son rejected is now being given by him to your grandson. Golf
The price of freedom is eternal vigilance.
-- Thomas Jefferson "The greatest pleasure in life is doing what others say you cannot do." (Anonymous) History will be kind to me for I intend to write it.
-- Winston Churchill "Man is a strange animal. He generally cannot read the handwriting on the wall until his back is up against it." (Adlai Stevenson) "The most beautiful things in the world are the most useless, peacocks and lilies, for instance." (John Ruskin) Golf "Have love for your friend up to a limit for it is possible he may turn into your enemy some day; and hate your enemy up to a limit for it is possible he may turn into your friend some day." (Ali bin Perfection is what American women expect to find in their husbands... but English women only
hope to find in their butlers.
-- W. Somerset Maugham My darling wife was always glum. I drowned her in a cask of rum, And so made sure that she would stay, In better spirits night and day. Golf
"The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time." (Abraham Lincoln, 1809-65) Facts are the enemy of truth.
- Don Quixote - Man of La Mancha Jealousy is the only vice that gives no pleasure.
-- Anonymous At every crossroads on the path that leads to the future, tradition has placed 10,000 men to guard
the past.
-- Maurice Maeterlink "A thing of beauty is a joy forever." (John Keats) Golf Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the
source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity,
ign You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty.
- Sacha Guitry Never tell. Not if you love your wife... In fact, if your old lady walks in on you, deny it. Yeah. Just
flat out and she'll believe it: "I'm tellin' ya. This chick came downstairs with a sign around Golf
"The only things worth learning are the things you learn after you know it all." (Harry S. Truman) Marriage is like a cage--one sees the birds outside desperate to get in and those inside equally
desparate to get out.
-- Di Peatlins The west wasn't won on salad.
-- ND Beef Council, billboard advertisement, 1990 A good marriage is at least 80 percent good luck in finding the right person at the right time. The
rest is trust.
-- Nanette Newman, British actress A man must marry only a very pretty woman in case he should ever want some other man to take
her off his hands.
-- Sacha Guitry Golf What do I dislike about death? Must be the hours.
-- Woody Allen Each religion, by the help of more or less myth which it takes more or less seriously, proposes
some method of fortifying the human soul and enabline it to make its peace with its destiny.
-- George A lover tries to stand in well with the pet dog of the house.
-- Moliere Golf
Sex is God's joke on human beings.
-- Bette Davis "What is tolerance? -- it is the consequence of humanity. We are all formed of frailty and error; let us pardon reciprocally each other's folly -- that is the first law of nature." (Francois Marie Ar "The evil that men do lives after them; The good is oft interred with their bones." (William Shakespeare, Julius Cĉsar. Act iii. Sc. 2.) The average, healthy, well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just plain
terrible.
-- Jean Kerr "There is no such thing as a person that nothing has happened to, and each person's story is as different as his fingertips." (Elsa Lanchester) Golf "The most exciting attractions are between two opposites that never meet." (Andy Warhol) Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
- George Burns I want to die in my sleep like my friend.... Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his
car.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker Golf
Never practice two vices at once.
-- Tallulah Bankhead My wife doesn't care what I do away from home, as long as I don't enjoy it. I'm proud to be paying taxes in the United States. The only thing is - I could be just as proud for
half the money.
-- Arthur Godfrey In the book of life, the answers aren't in the back.
-- Charlie Brown, character in "Peanuts" comic strip, created by Charles Schultz There is a coherent plan in the universe, though I don't know what it's a plan for.
-- Fred Hoyle Golf The best time to hold your tongue is the time you feel you must say something or bust.
-- Josh Billings The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds the most discoveries, is not
"Eureka!", but "That's funny..."
-- Isaac Asimov Use your own best judgment at all times.
-- The entire Nordstrom's Department Stores policy manual Golf
I require three things in a man: He must be handsome, ruthless, and stupid.
-- Dorothy Parker People only see what they are prepared to see.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson Universities incline wits to sophistry and affectation.
-- Francis Bacon Sex is God's joke on human beings.
-- Bette Davis At every crossroads on the path that leads to the future, tradition has placed 10,000 men to guard
the past.
-- Maurice Maeterlink Golf Marriage is a matter of give and take, but so far I haven't been able to find anybody who'll take
what I have to give.
-- Cass Daley "True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until it is lost." (Charles Caleb Colton) The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it.
-- George Bernard Shaw Golf
blah blah blah blah blah "This is the way the world ends: not with a bang, but a whimper." (Thomas Stearns Eliot, aka T. S. Eliot) _end]
[text_start]
"Hello Kitty is an icon that doesn't stand for a The world has suffered more from the ravages of ill-advised marriages than from virginity.
-- Ambrose Bierce Love is friendship set on fire.
- Jeremy Taylor "I consider it the highest compliment when my employees go out and start their own companies in competition with me. I always send them a plant to wish them well. Of course, it's a cactus." (Norman B We didn't lose the game; we just ran out of time.
- Vince Lombardi Golf We trained hard - but it seemed that every time we were beginning to form up into teams we were
reorganized. I was to learn later in life that we tend to meet any new situation by reorganizing,
and Too many pieces of music finish too long after the end.
-- Igor Stravinsky Faith is believing what you know ain't so.
-- Mark Twain Golf
Watching the debate this afternoon it was apparent they loved term limits in the House -- as
Brutus loved Caesar.
-- Bill Moyers They think they can make fuel from horse manure.... Now, I don't know if your car will be able to
get 30 miles to the gallon, but it's sure gonna put a stop to siphoning.
-- Billie Holliday Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.
- Henry Ford Marriage is the process of finding out what kind of man your wife would have preferred. "Today was good. / Today was fun. / Tomorrow is another one." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991) Golf "It is a curious thing that God learned Greek when he wished to turn author--and that he did not learn it better." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "No man is clever enough to know all the evil he does." (François VI Duke (duc) de La Rochefoucauld, 1616-80) What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death.
-- Dave Barry Golf
