"One of the things about acting is it allows you to live other people's lives without having to pay the price. I've never been one of those actors who has touted myself as a fascinating human being. I Chance is always powerful. - Let your hook be always cast; in the pool where you least expect it,
there will be a fish.
-- Ovid All television is children's television.
-- Richard P. Adler Football incorporates the two worst elements of American society: violence punctuated by
committee meetings.
-- George F. Will, journalist, political commentator, 1994 If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.
-- Scott Adams Education Love: An obsessive delusion that is cured by marriage. "One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar." (Helen Keller) The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same
time, and still retain the ability to function.
-- F. Scott Fitzgerald Education
It is a known fact that men are practical, hardheaded realists, in contrast to women, who are
romantic dreamers and actually believe that estrogenic skin cream must do something or they
couldn't cha "Better to be deprived of food for three days than tea for one." (Chinese Proverb) If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.
-- Aristotle Onassis Harpo, she's a lovely person. She deserves a good husband. Marry her before she finds one.
-- Oscar Levant, to Harpo Marx upon meeting Harpo's fiancee The Internet is so big, so powerful and pointless that for some people it is a complete substitute
for life.
-- Andrew Brown Education "Thanks to my solid academic training, today I can write hundreds of words on virtually any topic without possessing a shred of information, which is how I got a good job in journalism." (Dave Barry) God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at
the same time.
- Robin Williams, commenting on the Clinton/Lewinsky affair Parents are the bones upon which children sharpen their teeth.
-- Peter Ustinov Education
Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve.
-- George Bernard Shaw "Do not do unto others as you expect they should do unto you. Their tastes may not be the same." (George Bernard Shaw) "Listen, or your tongue will make you deaf." (Native American Proverb) A woman has got to love a bad man once or twice in her life to be thankful for a good one.
-- Mae West Harpo, she's a lovely person. She deserves a good husband. Marry her before she finds one.
-- Oscar Levant, to Harpo Marx upon meeting Harpo's fiancee Education Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you an
automobile.
-- Billy Sunday Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
-- Fred Allen The imaginary friends I had as a kid dropped me because their friends thought I didn't exist.
-- Aaron Machado Education
Never apologize for showing feeling. When you do so you apologize for truth.
-- Benjamin Disraeli An eye for an eye only leads to more blindness.
-- Margaret Atwood "No one lies so boldly as the man who is indignant." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Love is an ideal thing, marriage a real thing; a confusion of the real with the ideal never goes
unpunished.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe When a cat is dropped, it always lands on its feet, and when toast is dropped, it always lands with
the buttered side down. I propose to strap buttered toast to the back of a cat; the 2 will hover,
Education Sometimes you get shown the light in the strangest of places if you look at it right.
-- Jerry Garcia Great ability develops and reveals itself increasingly with every new assignment. Baltasar
Gracian We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming.
-- Wehrner von Braun Education
"All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That's his." (Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest) Thank heaven. A bachelor's life is no life for a single man.
-- Samuel Goldwyn, immigrant-turned-famous-movie-producer, when told his son was getting
married Anyone who considers arithmetical methods of producing random digits is, of course, in a state of
sin.
-- John Von Neuman Democracy is a form of government that substitutes election by the incompetent many for
appointment by the corrupt few.
-- George bernard Shaw A man must marry only a very pretty woman in case he should ever want some other man to take her off his hands. -- Guitry Education One may have a blazing hearth in one's soul and yet no one ever comes to sit by it. Passersby
see only a wisp of smoke rising from the chimney and continue on their way.
-- Vincent Van Gogh "One of the things about acting is it allows you to live other people's lives without having to pay the price. I've never been one of those actors who has touted myself as a fascinating human being. I Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech.
- Martin Fraquhar Tupper Education
"The masses are far more likely to believe a big lie than several small ones." (Adolf Hitler) Love one another and you will be happy. It's as simple and as difficult as that.
-- Michael Leunig Most people are more comfortable with old problems than with new solutions.
-- Anonymous I don't mind if you don't like my manners. I don't like them myself. They're pretty bad. I grieve over
them on long winter evenings.
-- Humphrey Bogart to Lauren Bacall, in "The Big Sleep" "Children today are tyrants. They contradict their parents, gobble their food, and tyrannize their teachers." (Socrates) Education In the end, everything is a gag.
-- Charlie Chaplin "If there is something to pardon in everything, there is also something to condemn." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, The Will to Power, 1888) Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called 'Ego'.
- Friedrich Nietzsche Education
All over Washington today, the politicians and the power brokers are happy. In fact, if you listen
closely, you can hear the sound of champagne corks popping.
-- Paul Jacob, Term Limits Executive Di Golf is a good walk spoiled.
-- Mark Twain Tauzin backs term limits -- But he thinks it's a bad idea.
-- Headline, story in the New Orleans Times-Picayune, Feb 20, 1995 Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.
-- Anonymous If I tell a lie it's only because I think I'm telling the truth.
-- Phil Gaglardi, Minister of Highways, British Columbia, Canada Education The highest use of capital is not to make more money, but to make money do more for the
betterment of life.
-- Henry Ford Practice random acts of kindness and sensless acts of beauty.
-- Adair Lara Laugh and the world laughs with you. Snore and you sleep alone.
-- Anthony Burgess Education
When you are right, you cannot be too radical; When you are wrong, you cannot be too
conservative.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. The real test of friendship is: Can you literally do nothing with the other person? Can you enjoy
together those moments of life that are utterly simple? They are the moments people looks back
on at "Man was born free and everywhere he is in chains." (Jean-Jacques Rousseau, French philosopher, The Social Contract) A hippo does not have a sting in its tail, but a wise man would still rather be sat on by a bee.
-- Polish proverb "Bread feeds the body, indeed, but flowers feed also the soul." (The Prophet Mohammad) Education The good people sleep much better at night than the bad people. Of course, the bad people enjoy
the waking hours much more.
-- Woody Allen "I think people resist freedom because they're afraid of the unknown. But it's ironic....That unknown was once very well known. It's where are souls belong....The only solution is to confront them--co "No man means all he says, and yet very few say all they mean, for words are slippery and thought is viscous." (Henry B. Adams) Education
Politics is for people who have a passion for changing life but lack a passion for living it.
-- Tom Robbins It's true that I did get the girl, but then my grandfather always said, "Even a blind chicken finds a
few grains of corn now and then."
-- Lyle Lovett, musician, upon marying actress Julia Roberts, It is because modern education is so seldom inspired by a great hope that it so seldom achieves
great results. The wish to preserve the past rather that the hope of creating the future dominates
the "Of all mankind the great poet is the equable man." (Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass, 1855) Opportunities multiply as they are seized.
-- Sun Tzu Education The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today.
-- Franklin D. Roosevelt Even a band of angels can turn ugly and start looting if enough angels are unemployed and
hanging around the Pearly Gates convinced that all the succubi own all the liquor stores in
Heaven.
-- P. J Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.
-- George Jean Nathan Education
Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind; And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind.
-- William Shakespeare, A Midsummer Night's Dream, Act i. Sc. 1. "Death is nothing, but to live defeated and inglorious is to die daily." (Napoleon Bonaparte) What is life? It is the flash of a firefly in the night. It is the breath of a buffalo in the wintertime. It is
the little shadow which runs across the grass and loses itself in the sunset.
-- Crow People think we make $3 million and $4 million a year. They don't realize that most of us only
make $500,000.
-- Pete Incaviglia, baseball player, 1990 A witty saying proves nothing.
- Voltaire Education Love is shown in your deeds, not in your words.
-- Fr. Jerome Cummings Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry.
-- Gloria Steinem "So little done, so much to do." (Cecil Rhodes) Education
You probably wouldn't worry about what people think of you if you could know how seldom they
do.
-- Olin Miller Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.
-- Bob Perelman Someday is not a day of the week.
-- Anon. "Love is always a stranger in the house of avarice." (Andreas Capellanus) Nothing average ever stood as a monument to progress. When progress is looking for a partner it
doesn't turn to those who believe they are only average. It turns instead to those who are forever
sea Education We're our own dragons as well as our own heroes, and we have to rescue ourselves from
ourselves.
-- Tom Robbins To correct a natural indifference I was placed half-way between misery and the sun. Misery kept
me from believing that all was well under the sun, and the sun taught me that history wasn't
everythin Not knowing when the dawn will come, I open every door.
-- Emily Dickinson Education
