"The evil that men do lives after them; The good is oft interred with their bones." (William Shakespeare, Julius Cæsar. Act iii. Sc. 2.) Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.
- H. G. Wells "Like as the waves make towards the pebbl'd shore, so do our minutes, hasten to their end." (William Shakespeare) Gravitation can not be held responsible for people falling in love.
-- Albert Einstein Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.
-- George Jean Nathan Recreation and Sports The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to
contact us.
-- Bill Watterson, in his comic strip Calvin and Hobbes Always talk to your wife while you're making love... if there's a phone handy. "Ninety percent of my salary I spent on booze and women ... and the other ten percent I wasted." (Tug McGraw, Major League Baseball pitcher) Recreation and Sports
It's not whether you get knocked down, it's whether you get back up.
-- Vince Lombardi "One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries." (A. A. Milne) I guess the only way to stop divorce is to stop marriage.
-- Will Rogers History is more or less bunk.
-- Henry Ford Always behave like a duck--keep calm and unruffled on the surface but paddle like the devil
underneath.
-- Jacob Braude Recreation and Sports Be like a postage stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there.
-- Josh Billings Let go of your attachment to being right, and suddenly your mind is more open. You're able to
benefit from the unique viewpoints of others, without being crippled by your own judgment.
-- Ralph Mars A good cook is like a sorceress who dispenses happiness.
-- Elsa Schiapirelli Recreation and Sports
If all men were brothers, would you let one marry your sister? A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your
girdle when your hips stick.
-- Ogden Nash "To make a living, craftiness is better than learnedness." (Pierre-Augustin de Beaumarchais) "True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until it is lost." (Charles Caleb Colton) Marriage is a thing which puts a ring on a woman's finger and two under the man's eyes. Recreation and Sports The honest poor can sometimes forget poverty. The honest rich can never forget it.
-- G. K. Chesterton The heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing.
-- Blaise Pascal, Pensées, trans. A.J. Krailsheimer Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.
- Mel Brooks Recreation and Sports
"It is my ambition to say in ten sentences what other men say in whole books--what other men do not say in whole books." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Twilight of the Idols) Don't be afraid your life will end; be afraid that it will never begin.
-- Grace Hansen "We live in an age when pizza gets to your home before the police." (Jeff Marder) Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere.
-- Chinese Proverb Men are strong only so long as they represent a strong idea. They become powerless when they
oppose it.
-- Sigmund Freud Recreation and Sports Whenever I date a guy, I think, is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
-- Rita Rudner And now, in keeping with Channel 40's policy of always bringing you the latest in blood and guts,
in living color, you're about to see another first -- an attempted suicide.
-- Chris Hubbock, who sh Creativity is piercing the mundane to find the marvelous.
-- Bill Moyers Recreation and Sports
No other success can compensate for failure in the home.
-- David O. McKay, Encyclopedia of Mormonism, Advice to parents at General Conference of he
LDS Church, April, 1964 Happiness in intelligent people is the rarest thing I know.
-- Ernest Hemingway The covers of this book are too far apart.
-- Ambrose Bierce "From the start, marriage was instituted for contemptible, practical reasons--an idea of men." (Catherine Deneuve) "Murderers have been known to find that young girls give them more trouble than anybody else." (Jean Cocteau, Les Enfants Terribles) Recreation and Sports "The concerned investment banker is the one who blows the horn on his Mercedes as he drives through a red light." (Anonymous) "There is only one success: to be able to spend your life in your own way, and not to give others absurd maddening claims upon it." (Christopher Darlington Morley) "'Contrariwise,' continued Tweedledee, 'if it was so, it might be, and if it were so, it would be; but as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic!'" (Lewis Carroll, Through the Looking Glass) Recreation and Sports
Giving birth is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head.
-- Carol Burnett Life is like music; it must be composed by ear, feeling, and instinct, not by rule.
-- Samuel Butler Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect.
-- Steven Wright If we let people see that kind of thing, there would never again be any war.
-- Pentagon official, on why US military censored graphic footage from the Gulf War The mathematician lives long and lives young; the wings of his soul do not early drop off, nor do
its pores become clogged with the earthy particles blown from the dusty highways of vulgar life.
-- Recreation and Sports The mind has exactly the same power as the hands: not merely to grasp the world, but to change
it.
-- Colin Wilson The mathematician lives long and lives young; the wings of his soul do not early drop off, nor do
its pores become clogged with the earthy particles blown from the dusty highways of vulgar life.
-- Fine art and pizza delivery: what we do falls neatly in between.
-- David Letterman Recreation and Sports
A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother why the bride changed her mind. "What
do you mean?" responded her mother. "Well, she went down the aisle with one man, and came
back with ano The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history...this century's history.... We all lived
in this century. I didn't live in this century.
-- Dan Quayle, then Indiana senator and Republic I never think of the future - it comes soon enough.
-- Albert Einstein There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well written or badly written.
-- Oscar Wilde Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than
you is a maniac.
-- George Carlin Recreation and Sports Time is at once the most valuable and most perishable of all our possessions.
-- John Randolph A life spent in making mistakes is not only more honorable but more useful than a life spent doing
nothing.
-- George Benard Shaw Happy are those who dream dreams and are willing to pay the price to make them come true.
-- Anon. Recreation and Sports
"Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain -- and most fools do." (Dale Carnegie) There is nothing so wrong in this world that a sensible woman can't set it right in the course of an
afternoon.
-- Giraudoux When Baby's cries grew hard to bear I popped him in the Frigidaire. I never would have done so if
I'd known that he'd be frozen stiff. My wife said, "George, I'm so unhappy! Our darling's now
comple "What is tolerance? -- it is the consequence of humanity. We are all formed of frailty and error; let us pardon reciprocally each other's folly -- that is the first law of nature." (Francois Marie Ar The executive exists to make sensible exceptions to general rules.
-- Elting E. Morison Recreation and Sports "I was born and raised with crocodiles; they are a piece of cake. But kids are so ... unpredictable." (Steve Irwin, "Crocodile Hunter") Of course there's a lot of knowledge in universities: the freshmen bring a little in; the seniors don't
take much away, so knowledge sort of accumulates...
-- Anonymous Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars
-- Les Brown Recreation and Sports
In America, anybody can be president. That's one of the risks you take.
-- Adlai Stevenson Look not mournfully into the Past. It comes not back again. Wisely improve the Present. It is
thine. Go forth to meet the shadowy Future, without fear, and with a manly heart.
-- Henry Wadsworth Lo When women go wrong, men go right after them.
-- Mae West In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been
widely regarded as a bad move.
-- Douglas Adams Many a man that could rule a hundherd millyon sthrangers with an ir'n hand is careful to take off
his shoes in the front hallway whin he comes home late at night.
-- Finley Peter Dunne, Mr. Dooley O Recreation and Sports Before I married, I had three theories about raising children and no children. Now, I have three
children and no theories.
-- John Wilmot, Earl of Rochester "Nothing touches a work of art so little as words of criticism: they always result in more or less fortunate misunderstandings." (Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet) The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling.
-- Paula Poundstone Recreation and Sports
Marriage isn't a word... it's a sentence.
-- King Vidor, in the 1928 film, The Crawl The difference between literature and journalism is that journalism is unreadable and literature is
not read.
-- Oscar Wilde This world is a comedy for those who think and a tragedy for those who feel.
-- Horace Walpole Now comes the mystery.
-- Henry Ward Beecher, dying words, March 8, 1887 When I can no longer bear to think of the victims of broken homes, I begin to think of the victims
of intact ones.
-- Peter DeVries Recreation and Sports Like a prune, you are not getting any better looking, but you are getting sweeter.
-- N. D. Stice Beginning in February 1976 your assistance benefits will be discontinued ... Reason: it has been
reported to our office that you expired on January 1, 1976.
-- excerpt from a letter, Illinois Depart Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.
-- Oscar Wilde Recreation and Sports
The trouble with children is that they are not returnable.
-- Quentin Crisp "If I work toward an end, meantime I am confined to a process. The rainbow is more beautiful than the pot at the end of it, because the rainbow is now. And the pot never turns out to be quite what I e "It is dangerous to be right in matters on which the established authorities are wrong." (Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire, 1694-1778) The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. What is called resignation is confirmed
desperation.
-- Henry David Thoreau, Walden (1854) The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work.
- Emile Zola Recreation and Sports When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are
legislators.
-- P. J. O'Rourke Go on, get out. Last words are for fools who haven't said enough.
-- Karl Marx, dying words to his housekeeper We never reflect how pleasant it is to ask for nothing.
-- Seneca Recreation and Sports
