The democratic theory is that if you accumulate enough ignorance at the polls, you produce
intelligence.
-- Philo Vance University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.
-- Henry Kissinger In the late 1600s the finest instruments originated from three rural families whose workshops
were side by side in the Italian village of Cremona. First were the Amatis, and outside their shop
hung "Deep down, no one really believes they have a right to live. But this death sentence generally stays tucked away, hidden beneath the difficulty of living. If that difficulty is removed from time to t Being in therapy is great. I spend an hour just talking about myself. It's kinda like being the guy on
a date.
-- Caroline Rhea Tomintoul Before you put on a frown, make absolutely sure there are no smiles available.
-- Jim Beggs Imagine if birds were tickled by feathers. You'd see a flock of birds come by, laughing hysterically!
-- Steven Wright Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to
us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.
-- Jeff Raskin Tomintoul
Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called 'Ego'.
- Friedrich Nietzsche With this ring I thee wed, with my body I thee worship, and with all my worldly good I thee endow.
-- Wedding Vow, Book of Common Prayer "Democracy is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half of the time." (E. B. White) May you live happily ever after with a poor, ugly, shrewish wife. Nothing is wrong with California that a rise in the ocean level wouldn't cure.
- Ross MacDonald Tomintoul There is nothing so wrong in this world that a sensible woman can't set it right in the course of an
afternoon.
-- Giraudoux I envy people who drink -- at least they know what to blame everything on.
-- Oscar Levant Beware of men on airplanes. The minute a man reaches thirty thousand feet, he immediately
becomes consumed by distasteful sexual fantasies which involve doing uncomfortable things in
those tiny toil Tomintoul
When one is trying to do something beyond his known powers it is useless to seek the approval
of friends. Friends are at their best in moments of defeat.
-- Henry Miller Trust, but verify.
-- Ronald Reagan Knowledge is the intellectual manipulation of carefully verified observations.
-- Sigmund Freud I believe in equality for everyone, except reporters and photographers.
-- Gandhi America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room. Every time it wags its tail, it knocks over a
chair.
-- Arnold Toynbee Tomintoul Blessed is he who has learned to laugh at himself, for he shall never cease to be entertained.
-- John Powell Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.
-- Anonymous "Truth lies not only in a dream, but in many dreams." (Pier Paolo Pasolini, Italian poet, novelist and filmmaker) Tomintoul
It's true that I did get the girl, but then my grandfather always said, "Even a blind chicken finds a
few grains of corn now and then."
-- Lyle Lovett, musician, upon marying actress Julia Roberts, Fanaticism consists of redoubling your efforts when you have forgotten your aim.
-- George Santayana Usenet is like Tetris for people who still remember how to read.
-- Button from the Computer Museum, Boston, MA Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly.
-- Rose Franken "Like as the waves make towards the pebbl'd shore, so do our minutes, hasten to their end." (William Shakespeare) Tomintoul "I don't use drugs, my dreams are frightening enough." (M. C. Escher) Conceit causes more conversation than wit.
-- LaRouchefoucauld A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your
girdle when your hips stick.
-- Ogden Nash Tomintoul
Its failings notwithstanding, there is much to be said in favor of journalism in that by giving us the
opinion of the uneducated, it keeps us in touch with the ignorance of the community.
-- Oscar W Perhaps, after all, America never has been discovered. I myself would say that it had merely
been detected.
-- Oscar Wilde "To avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing, be nothing." (Elbert Hubbard, American author, 1856-1915) They gave me a book of checks. They didn't ask for any deposits.
-- Joe Early, Congressman (D-Mass), at a press conference to answer questions about the
House Bank scandal Laundry increases exponentially in the number of children.
-- Miriam Robbins Tomintoul "Talent does what it can; genius does what it must." (Edward Robert Bulwer-Lytton) "Defeat the fear of death and welcome the death of fear." (G. Gordon Liddy) It is best to learn as we go, not go as we have learned.
-- Leslie Jeanne Sahler Tomintoul
"Jesus died too soon. If he had lived to my age he would have repudiated his doctrine." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) blah "Some of the worlds greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enough to know they were impossible. unattributed" (Anonymous) Ah, well, then I suppose I shall have to die beyond my means.
-- Oscar Wilde, dying words We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind her stands his wife. -- Groucho Marx Once the realization is accepted that even between the closest human beings infinite distances
continue to exist, a wonderful living side by side can grow up, if they succeed in loving the
distance Tomintoul In view of all the deadly computer viruses that have been spreading lately, Weekend Update
would like to remind you: when you link up to another computer, you're linking up to every
computer that th Why doesn't she like me? Is it my hair, my overbite, the fact that I've worn the same shirt and
shorts for the last four years?
-- Bart Simpson, young character from The Simpsons, U.S. animated tele An act of love that fails is just as much a part of the divine life as an act of love that succeeds, for
love is measured by fullness, not by reception.
-- Harold Loukes Tomintoul
We live at a time when man believes himself fabulously capable of creation, but he does not
know what to create.
-- Jose Ortega y Gasset Seeing much, suffering much, and studying much, are the three pillars of learning.
-- Benjamin Disraeli Better watch out that you won't become a television set in your next life.
--Loesje "He who cannot give anything away cannot feel anything either." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) I base my fashion sense on what doesn't itch.
-- Gilda Radner Tomintoul "I expect nothing. I fear no one. I am free." (Nikos Kazantzakis) "Whether it is a black cat or a white cat, as long as it can catch the rat, it is a good cat." (Deng Xiao Ping) When you've spent half your political life dealing with humdrum issues like the environment... it's
exciting to have a real crisis on your hands.
-- Margaret Thatcher, on the Falklands Conflict Tomintoul
"To make a living, craftiness is better than learnedness." (Pierre-Augustin de Beaumarchais) "The one charm about marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties." (Oscar Wilde) My wife submits and I obey; she always lets me have her way. If law school is so hard to get through... how come there are so many lawyers?
-- Calvin Trillin Examinations are formidable even to the best prepared, for the greatest fool may ask more than
the wisest man can answer.
-- Charles Caleb Colton Tomintoul The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and
science.
-- Albert Einstein University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.
- Henry Kissinger "It serves me right for putting all my eggs in one bastard." (Dorothy Parker, 1893-1967, US writer) Tomintoul
There is nothing better for the spirit or the body than a love affair. It elevates the thoughts and
flattens the stomachs.
-- Barbara Howar blah "Great things are not done by impulse, but by a series of small things brought together." (Vincent van Gogh) The closer I'm bound in love to you, the closer I am to free.
-- Indigo Girls, song lyric No, that is the great fallacy; the wisdom of old men. They do not grow wise. They grow careful." (Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell To Arms) I would venture to guess that Anon, who wrote so many poems without signing them, was often a
woman.
-- Virginia Woolf Tomintoul Work expands to fill the time available.
-- PARKINSON'S LAW Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a
brand new ending.
-- Anonymous One survey found that ten percent of Americans thought Joan of Arc was Noah's wife....
-- Robert Boynton Tomintoul
"The man who lets himself be bored is even more contemptible than the bore." (Samuel Butler) I know I'm not in government anymore. In fact I'm out of work.
-- Ronald Reagan, Former U.S. President, on a speaking tour of Japan, 1989 The less their ability, the more their conceit.
Ahad HaAm You can pay attention to the fact, in which case you'll probably become a mathematician, or you
can ignore it, in which case you'll probably become a physicist.
-- Len Evans, professor, Northwestern "Transport of the mails, transport of the human voice, transport of flickering pictures--in this century as in others our highest accomplishments still have the single aim of bringing men together." Tomintoul "When you resort to attacking the messenger and not the message, you have lost the debate." (Addison Whithecomb) Happiness is nothing more than health and a poor memory.
-- Albert Schweitzer Marriage is like a box of chocolates. You have to squeeze a few bottoms to make sure you like
what you are getting.
-- Anonymous Tomintoul
If your professor wrote it, it's as near to the truth as you ever need to get.
-- John Watson, University of Canterbury When in doubt, make a fool of yourself. There is a microscopically thin line between being
brilliantly creative and acting like the most gigantic idiot on earth. So what the hell, leap.
-- Cynthia H "Whenever a friend succeeds, a little something in me dies." (Gore Vidal) Books, like friends, should be few and well chosen.
-- Samuel Paterson "I hear, I know. I see, I remember. I do, I understand." (Confucius, 551 BC-479) Tomintoul It's impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
-- Woody Allen Even death is not to be feared by one who has lived wisely.
-- Buddha "All our best men are laughed at in this nightmare land." (Jack Keroac) Tomintoul
