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"I was born and raised with crocodiles; they are a piece of cake. But kids are so ... unpredictable." (Steve Irwin, "Crocodile Hunter") Blessed is the man, who having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact.
- George Eliot We can never be sure that the opinion we are endeavoring to stifle is a false opinion; and if we
were sure, stifling it would be an evil still.
-- John Stuart Mill "It seems to me that there are two kinds of trickery: the 'fronts' people assume before one another's eyes, and the 'front' a writer puts on the face of reality." (Francois Sagan) The louder he talked of his honour, the faster we counted our spoons.
-- Emerson, Ralph Waldo Transport "I praise loudly. I blame softly." (Catherine the Great) This is the fourth?
-- Thomas Jefferson, dying words Love is the wisdom of the fool and the folly of the wise.
-- Samuel Johnson Transport
Man is a natural polygamist. He always has one woman leading him by the nose and another
hanging on to his coattails.
-- H. L. Mencken Never go to bed angry. Stay up and fight.
-- Phyllis Diller A man in the house is worth two in the street.
-- Mae West You'd be surprised how much it costs to look this cheap.
-- Dolly Parton Whenever you are asked if you can do a job, tell 'em, "Certainly, I can!" Then get busy and find
out how to do it.
-- Theodore Roosevelt Transport Ninety percent of everything is crap.
-- Theodore Sturgeon "Like as the waves make towards the pebbl'd shore, so do our minutes, hasten to their end." (William Shakespeare) We have drugs to make women speak, but none to keep them silent.
-- Anatole France Transport
If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get
married.
-- Katharine Hepburn Organic chemistry is the chemistry of carbon compounds. Biochemistry is the study of carbon
compounds that crawl.
-- Mike Adams "The market is not an invention of capitalism. It has existed for centuries. It is an invention of civilization." (Mikhail Gorbachev, June 8, 1990) "I'm basically an optimist in life but this doesn't prevent me from deducing as a scientist that we are probably doomed." (Vladimir Chaloupka, physicist, University of Washington, regarding mankind's The difference between marriage and death? Dead people are free. Transport Better to have loved a short man than never to have loved a tall.
-- David Chambless blah "You can lead a man to Congress, but you can't make him think." (Milton Berle) Christianity has not been tried and found wanting; it has been found difficult and not tried.
-- G. K. Chesterton Transport
There are three great friends: an old wife, an old dog, and ready money.
-- Benjamin Franklin If a man is talking in the forest, and there is no woman there to hear him, is he still wrong?
-- Jenny Weber "Everywhere one seeks to produce meaning, to make the world signify, to render it visible. We are not, however, in danger of lacking meaning; quite the contrary, we are gorged with meaning and it is k To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance
- Oscar Wilde Love begins with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a teardrop.
-- Anonymous Transport If you want anything done well, do it yourself. This is why most people laugh at their own jokes.
-- Bob Edwards This compact disc is made from analog masters recorded without noise reduction. Half the tracks,
in fact, were recorded in a dismal, cheap basement eight-track studio with puddles of water on
the fl I hope you have not been leading a double life, pretending to be wicked and being really good all
the time. That would be hypocrisy.
-- Oscar Wilde Transport
In the book of life, the answers aren't in the back.
-- Charlie Brown, character in "Peanuts" comic strip, created by Charles Schultz "Our destiny exercises its influence over us even when, as yet, we have not learned its nature: it is our future that lays down the law of our today." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Very little is known of the Canadian country since it is rarely visited by anyone but the Queen and
illiterate sport fishermen.
-- P. J. O'Rourke The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. But not in that order.
-- Brian Pickrell In the case of good books, the point is not to see how many of them you can get through, but how
many can get through to you.
-- Mortimer J. Adler Transport "The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn." (David Russell) A dollar saved is a quarter earned.
-- John Ciardi Hell is a half-filled auditorium.
-- Robert Frost Transport
Better watch out that you won't become a television set in your next life.
--Loesje Someday is not a day of the week.
-- Anon. "He that would make his own liberty secure must guard even his enemy from oppression; for if he violates this duty he establishes a precedent that will reach to himself." (Thomas Paine) "You know what charm is: a way of getting the answer yes without having asked any clear question." (Albert Camus, The Fall) Avoid having your ego so close to your position that when your position falls, your ego goes with
it.
-- Colin Powell Transport Soul meets soul on lovers lips.
-- Percy Bysshe Shelley You have a cough? Go home tonight, eat a whole box of Ex-Lax--tomorrow you'll be afraid to
cough.
-- Pearl Williams Genius has somewhat of the infantine; But of the childish not a touch or taint.
-- Robert Browning Transport
If it is not right do not do it; if it is not true do not say it.
-- Marcus Aurelius Conceit causes more conversation than wit.
-- LaRouchefoucauld If people turn to look at you on the street, you are not well dressed.
-- Beau Brummel "Everywhere one seeks to produce meaning, to make the world signify, to render it visible. We are not, however, in danger of lacking meaning; quite the contrary, we are gorged with meaning and it is k The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon, but that we wait so long to begin it.
-- Anonymous Transport "The depth and strength of a human character are defined by its moral reserves. People reveal themselves completely only when they are thrown out of the customary conditions of their life, for only th I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all
over it and put your name at the top.
-- English Professor, Ohio University I should have no objection to a repetition of the same life from its beginning, only asking the
advantages authors have in a second edition to correct some faults of the first.
-- Benjamin Franklin Transport
It's true that I did get the girl, but then my grandfather always said, "Even a blind chicken finds a
few grains of corn now and then."
-- Lyle Lovett, musician, upon marying actress Julia Roberts, "By seeing the seed of failure in every success, we remain humble. By seeing the seed of success in every failure we remain hopeful." (Mel Ziegler, founder of Banana Republic) Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.
-- George Jean Nathan Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.
-- Albert Einstein You will marry into an Indian tribe and become one big Hopi family. Transport "People drag their progeny around with them like a ball and chain, like some terrible deadweight that hinders their every move - and that, as often as not, effectively winds up killing them." (Michel Man and wife make one fool. The streets are safe in Philadelphia. It's only the people who make them unsafe.
-- Frank Rizzo, ex-police chief and mayor of Philadelphia Transport
I admire the serene assurance of those who have religious faith. It is wonderful to observe the
calm confidence of a Christian with four aces.
-- Mark Twain Marriage is the sole cause of divorce. To write a good love letter, you ought to begin without knowing what you mean to say, and to
finish without knowing what you have written.
-- Jean Jacques Rousseau If you cannot be the master of your language, you must be its slave. If you cannot examine your
thoughts, you have no choice but to think them, however silly they may be.
-- Richard Mitchell, from It's impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
-- Woody Allen Transport "Marriage excuses no one the freak's roll-call." (Joe Orton, What the Butler Saw) "Experience is one thing you can't get for nothing." (Oscar Wilde) Democracy encourages the majority to decide things about which the majority is blissfully
ignorant.
--John Simon Transport
Consequences, schmonsequences, as long as I'm rich!
-- Chuck Jones-directed cartoon blah "Each friend represents a world in us; a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only in meeting them that a new world is born." (Anais Nin) Giving birth is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head.
-- Carol Burnett Never tell. Not if you love your wife... In fact, if your old lady walks in on you, deny it. Yeah. Just
flat out and she'll believe it: "I'm tellin' ya. This chick came downstairs with a sign around Reason can answer questions, but imagination has to ask them.
-- Ralph N. Gerard Transport "Anyone who thinks they're important is usually just a pompous moron who can't deal with his or her own pathetic insignificance and the fact that what they do is meaningless and inconsequential..." ( Work is a four-letter word.
-- The Smiths (Morrissey) The reason most people play golf is to wear clothes they would not be caught dead in otherwise.
-- Roger Simon Transport
Usenet is like Tetris for people who still remember how to read.
-- Button from the Computer Museum, Boston, MA A poem is never finished, only abandoned.
-- Paul Valery "Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishments." (Anonymous) "The English have all the material requisites for the revolution. What they lack is the spirit of generalization and revolutionary ardour." (Karl Marx) "I put on an act sometimes, and people think I'm insensitive. Really, it's like a kind of armor because I'm too sensitive. If there are two hundred people in a room and one of them doesn't like me, I' Transport It is always incomprehensible to a man that a woman should ever refuse an offer of marriage.
-- Jane Austen UGLINESS, n. A gift of the gods to certain women, entailing virtue without humility.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 "Friendship is born at the moment when one person says to another, 'What?! You too! Thought I was the only one.'" (Clive Staples Lewis) Transport
