Choose a wife by your ear than your eye.
-- Thomas Fuller, 1732 It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.
-- Anonymous I tried a mail order bride, once, but she was damaged in the mail, and I had to return the unused part for my full refund. The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his.
- General George Patton "Think where mans glory most begins and ends, and say my glory was I had such friends." (William Butler Yeats) H Never tell. Not if you love your wife... In fact, if your old lady walks in on you, deny it. Yeah. Just
flat out and she'll believe it: "I'm tellin' ya. This chick came downstairs with a sign around "Every act of creation is first an act of destruction." (Pablo Picasso) What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson H
"One often contradicts an opinion when what is uncongenial is really the tone in which it was conveyed." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.
- Mel Brooks Silence is argument carried out by other means.
-- Ernesto "Che" Guevara "We must view young people not as empty bottles to be filled but as candles to be lit." (Robert Shaffer) "Every great institution is the lengthened shadow of a single man. His character determines the character of the organization." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) H When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all go play in his
cave, and every once in a while he would eat one of us. It wasn't until later that I found out that
Uncl When people have no other tyrant, their own public opinion becomes one.
-- Edward Bulwer-Lytton Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ergo...
-- Anonymous H
Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.
-- Albert Einstein If a man does his best, what else is there?
- General George S. Patton If we may believe our logicians, man is distinguished from all other creatures by the
faculty of laughter.
-- Joseph Addison No man should marry until he has studied anatomy and dissected at least one woman. -- Honore de Balzac I don't mind if you don't like my manners. I don't like them myself. They're pretty bad. I grieve over
them on long winter evenings.
-- Humphrey Bogart to Lauren Bacall, in "The Big Sleep" H In any contest between power and patience, bet on patience.
- W.B. Prescott "Humanity has won its battle. Liberty now has a country." (Marquis de Lafayette) No race can prosper till it learns that there is as much dignity in tilling a field as in writing a poem.
-- Booker T. Washington H
"It seems to me that almost all our sadnesses are moments of tension, which we feel as paralysis because we no longer hear our astonished emotions living." (Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poe I'm not dumb, I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.
-- Calvin If other people are going to talk, conversation becomes impossible.
-- James McNeill Whistler "Good taste is the first refuge of the non-creative. It is the last-ditch stand of the artist." (Marshall McLuhan) Tear open packet, unfold and use.
-- Directions on moist towelette package H "Eternal vigilance is the price of freedom." (Raymonde Uy) Children today are tyrants. They contradict their parent, gobble their food, and tyrannize their
teachers.
-- Socrates There's too much blood in my caffeine system.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker H
The difference between pornography and erotica is lighting.
-- Gloria Leonard My wife says if I go fishing one more time she's going to leave me. Gosh, I'm going to miss her. If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there and worrying. It's the worry
that gets you, not the loss of sleep.
-- Dale Carnegie Morality consists in suspecting other people of not being legally married.
-- George Bernard Shaw It is the final proof of God's omnipotence that he need not exist in order to save us.
-- Peter De Vries H Some birds aren't meant to be caged, their feathers are just too bright. And when they fly away,
the part of you that knows it was a sin to lock them up, does rejoice. I guess I just miss my friend. If we knew what we were doing, it wouldn't be called research, would it?
-- Albert Einstein First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.
- Mahatma Gandhi H
A memorandum is written not to inform the reader but to protect the writer.
-- Dean Acheson Someday is not a day of the week.
-- Anon. It is never too late to be what you might have been.
-- George Eliot "Vegiburgers are wrong." (Mike Kaup) "We have to be able to criticise what we love, to say what we have to say 'cause if your not trying to make something better, than as far as I can tell, you are just in the way." (Ani Difranco) H Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born in it.
-- George Bernard Shaw If you can't feed a hundred people, then feed just one.
-- Mother Teresa the social sciences were for all those who had not yet decided what to do with their lives, and for
all those whose premature frustrations led them into the sterile alleys of confrontation.
-- Peter H
I have read your book and much like it.
-- Moses Hadas, book reviewer Guide to understanding a net.addict's day:
Slow day: didn't have much to do, so spent three hours on usenet.
Busy day: managed to work in three hours of usenet.
Bad day: barely squeezed in three ho Everything that is really great and inspiring is created by the individual who can labour in
freedom.
-- Albert Einstein In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that
no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite.
-- Paul Dirac "No one ever owns his youth or the women he loves." (Pedro Almodóvar, Live Flesh) H You can't say civilization isn't advancing: in every war they kill you in a new way.
-- Will Rogers I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.
- Thomas Watson, Chairman of IBM, 1943 "Experience: that most brutal of teachers. But you learn; my God, do you learn!" (Clive Staples Lewis) H
Mother-in-law: A woman who destroys her son-in-law's peace of mind by giving him a piece of
hers.
-- Anonymous The theory used to be you marry an older man because they are more mature. The new theory is that men don't mature. So you might as well marry a younger one. They're almost inseparable. Sometimes it takes ten people to separate them.
-- Anonymous Marriage is like a violin. After the music is over, you still have the strings.
-- Anonymous "That government is best which governs the least, because its people discipline themselves." (Thomas Jefferson) H "Not only is there no guarantee of the temporal immortality of the human soul, that is to say of its eternal survival after death; but, in any case, this assumption completely fails to accomplish the Love is a perky elf dancing a merry little jig and then suddenly he turns on you with a miniature
machine gun.
-- Matt Groening, Love is Hell Man's mind stretched to a new idea never goes back to its original dimensions.
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes H
Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence--a life sentence. I still live.
-- Daniel Webster, dying words "Love is blind; friendship closes its eyes." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) The highest use of capital is not to make more money, but to make money do more for the
betterment of life.
-- Henry Ford Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.
-- Jackie Mason H "Man looks in the abyss, there's nothing staring back at him. At that moment, man finds his character. And that is what keeps him out of the abyss." (Hal Holbrook, Wallstreet) Whenever I date a guy, I think, is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
-- Rita Rudner If you can't annoy somebody, there's little point in writing.
-- Kingsley Amis H
How could they tell?
-- Dorothy Parker, upon hearing that President Coolidge had died "The greatest pleasure in life is doing what others say you cannot do." (Anonymous) Give the people not hell, but hope and courage.
-- John Murray "The most beautiful things in the world are the most useless, peacocks and lilies, for instance." (John Ruskin) Who controls the past controls the future. Who controls the present controls the past.
-- George Orwell H Husband: a man who buys his football tickets four months in advance and waits until December 24 to do his Christmas shopping. Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils.
-- Hector Louis Berlioz If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?
-- Lily Tomlin H
Never apologize for showing feeling. When you do so you apologize for truth.
-- Benjamin Disraeli Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.
-- Anonymous Elegance of language may not be in the power of all of us; but simplicity and straight forwardness
are. Write much as you would speak; speak as you think. If with your inferior, speak no coarser
tha Courage: doing what you're afraid to do. There can be no courage unless you're scared.
-- Eddie Rickenbacker "Talent does what it can; genius does what it must." (Edward Robert Bulwer-Lytton) H It's not whether you get knocked down, it's whether you get back up.
-- Vince Lombardi The Churches must learn humility as well as teach it.
-- George Bernard Shaw, St. Joan Once all struggle is grasped, miracles are possible.
-- Mao Tse-tung H
