"Men act and women appear. Men look at women. Women watch themselves being looked at." (John Berger) Truth must necessarily be stranger than fiction, for fiction is the creation of the human mind and
therefore congenial to it.
-- G. K. Chesterton God help the man who won't marry until he finds a perfect woman, and God help him still more if
he finds her.
-- Benjamin Tillett Obedience is the gateway through which knowledge, yes, and love, too, enter the mind of the
child.
-- Anne Sullivan The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his.
- General George Patton W "I know that God won't give me more trouble than I can handle ... but sometimes I wish he wouldn't trust me so much." (Mother Teresa) America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room. Every time it wags its tail, it knocks over a
chair.
-- Arnold Toynbee Always bear in mind that your own resolution to success is more important than any other one
thing.
-- Abraham Lincoln W
To correct a natural indifference I was placed half-way between misery and the sun. Misery kept
me from believing that all was well under the sun, and the sun taught me that history wasn't
everythin "Fools rush in where angels fear to tread." (Alexander Pope) In view of all the deadly computer viruses that have been spreading lately, Weekend Update
would like to remind you: when you link up to another computer, you're linking up to every
computer that th Live out of your imagination, not your history.
-- Stephen Covey Wisdom is knowing what to do next; virtue is doing it.
-- David Starr Jordan W And since the stench of death will always attract flies and vermin, the arrival of Geraldo was
perhaps inevitable.
-- Garry Trudeau If your wife wants to learn how to drive, don't stand in her way. I feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor's sixth husband. I know what I'm supposed to do, but I don't know how
to make it interesting.
-- Milton Berle, when called to the microphone at the 2nd Annual Comedians Hal W
The honest poor can sometimes forget poverty. The honest rich can never forget it.
-- G. K. Chesterton People need loving the most when they deserve it the least.
-- John Harrigan "The White Rabbit put on his spectacles. 'Where shall I begin, please your Majesty?' he asked. 'Begin at the beginning,' the King said gravely, 'and go on till you come to the end: then stop.'" (Lewi Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.
- Napoleon Bonaparte If ever two were one, then surely we.
If ever man were loved by wife, then thee.
-- Anne Bradstreet W I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
-- Groucho Marx Children are the only form of immortality that we can be sure of.
-- Peter Ustinov I can write better than anybody who can write faster, and I can write faster than anybody who can
write better.
- A. J. Liebling W
"Contrariwise," continued Tweedledee, "if it was so, it might be, and if it were so, it would be; but
as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic!"
-- Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland If you are all wrapped up in yourself, you are overdressed
-- Kate Halverson It's impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
-- Woody Allen Airplane travel is nature's way of making you look like your passport photo.
-- Al Gore, U.S. Vice President blah "The length of this document defends it well against the risk of its being read." (Sir Winston Churchill, 1874-1965) W Go on, get out. Last words are for fools who haven't said enough.
-- Karl Marx, dying words to his housekeeper "Marriage excuses no one the freak's roll-call." (Joe Orton, What the Butler Saw) Never look at the trombones. You'll only encourage them.
-- Richard Strauss, on conducting W
There ought to be one day - just one - when there is open season on senators.
-- Will Rogers History will be kind to me for I intend to write it.
-- Winston Churchill There are two means of refuge from the misery of life - music and cats.
-- Albert Schweitzer "It is the nature of a man as he grows older, a small bridge in time, to protest against change, particularly change for the better." (John Steinbeck, Travels With Charley) The wit of a graduate student is like champagne. Canadian champagne.
-- Robertson Davies W The best theology would need no advocates; it would prove itself.
-- Karl Barth Trust, but verify.
-- Ronald Reagan The gods too are fond of a joke.
-- Aristotle W
Government is like a baby. An alimentary canal with a big appetite at one end and no sense of
responsibility at the other.
-- Ronald Reagan, Saturday Evening Post, 1965 "What you do speaks so loudly that I cannot hear what you say." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough.
-- Groucho Marx "I run to see who has the most guts." (Steve Roland Prefontaine) "Friends can help each other. A true friend is someone who lets you have total freedom to be yourself--and especially to feel. Or, not feel. Whatever you happen to be feeling at the moment is fine wit W "One often contradicts an opinion when what is uncongenial is really the tone in which it was conveyed." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Go away...I'm alright.
-- H. G. Wells, dying words Once all struggle is grasped, miracles are possible.
-- Mao Tse-tung W
By working faithfully eight hours a day, you might eventually get to be a boss and work twelve
hours a day.
-- ROBERT FROST Women want mediocre men, and men are working hard to become as mediocre as possible.
-- Margaret Mead Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it.
Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it.
Hatred darkens life; love illumines it.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. "Any intelligent woman who reads the marriage contract, and then goes into it, deserves all the consequences." (Isadora Duncan) Hell is paved with good samaritans.
-- William M. Holden W Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough.
-- Groucho Marx Motivation will almost always beat mere talent.
-- Norman R. Augustine When a girl marries, she exchanges the attentions of many men for the inattention of one.
-- Helen Rowland W
I don't know which is more discouraging, literature or chickens.
-- E. B. White Our elections are free - it's in the results where eventually we pay.
-- Bill Stern Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her. Fighting is essentially a masculine idea; a woman's weapon is her tongue.
-- Hermione Gingold Never be unfaithful to a lover, except with your wife. -- PJ O'Rourke W Honolulu, it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother.
-- Ken Dodd Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.
-- Aldous Huxley Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.
- Napoleon Bonaparte W
In any organization there will always be one person who knows what is going on. This person
must be fired.
-- Conway's Law We do not remember days; we remember moments.
-- Anonymous People need loving the most when they deserve it the least.
-- John Harrigan There is no realizable power that man cannot, in time, fashion the tools to attain, nor any power so secure that the naked ape will not abuse it. So it is written in the genetic cards - only physics a Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.
-- Aldous Huxley W Marriage is popular because it combines the maximum of temptation with the maximum of
opportunity.
-- George Bernard Shaw We make our friends; we make our enemies; but God makes our next door neighbour.
-- G. K. Chesterton "A girl can wait for the right man to come along, but in the meantime that still doesn't mean she can't have a wonderful time with all the wrong ones." (Cher) W
The principle of give and take is the principle of diplomacy - give one and take ten.
-- Mark Twain Love matches are made by people who are content, for a month of honey, to condemn
themselves to a life of vinegar.
-- Countess of Blessington This compact disc is made from analog masters recorded without noise reduction. Half the tracks,
in fact, were recorded in a dismal, cheap basement eight-track studio with puddles of water on
the fl A team effort is a lot of people doing what I say.
-- Michael Winner All that is gold does not glitter. Not all those who wander are lost;
-- J.R.R. Tolkein W Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power. We have guided missiles and misguided men.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. As for courage and will - we cannot measure how much of each lies within us, we can only trust
there will be sufficient to carry through trials which may lie ahead.
-- Andre Norton Love is the answer, but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good
questions.
-- Woody Allen W
"A conservative is a man who sits and thinks, mostly sits." (Woodrow Wilson, 28th US president, 1856-1924) Life is to be fortified by many friendships. To love and to be loved is the greatest happiness of
existence.
-- Sydney Smith Well, I think that it's a- it's had some difficult times but I think we have- we, I think, have been able
to make some very good progress and it's- I would say that it's- it's- it's delightful that w "Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships." (Sharon Stone) My religion consists of a humble admiration of the unlimitable superior who reveals Himself in the
slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble minds. That deeply emotional
convi W Parents are the bones upon which children sharpen their teeth.
-- Peter Ustinov Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.
-- Anonymous A good novel tells us the truth about its hero; but a bad novel tells us the truth about its author.
-- G. K. Chesterton W
