Anything too stupid to be said, is sung.
-- Voltaire War is a profession by which a man cannot live honorably; an employment by which the soldier, if
he would reap any profit, is obliged to be false, rapacious, and cruel.
-- Niccolo Machiavelli I owe the government $3400 in taxes. So I sent them two hammers and a toilet seat.
-- Michael McShane Motivation will almost always beat mere talent.
-- Norman R. Augustine Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not
there, I go to work.
-- Robert Orben Musicians What is politics, after all, but the compulsion to preside over property and make other peoples'
decisions for them?
-- Tom Robbins, Skinny Legs and All There's too much blood in my caffeine system.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker To marry is to halve your rights and double your duties.
-- Arthur Schopenhauer Musicians
The whole problem can be stated quite simply by asking, "Is there a meaning to music?" My
answer would be, "Yes." And "Can you state in so many words what the meaning is?" My answer
to that would be Hegel was right when he said that we learn from history that man can never learn anything from
history.
-- George Bernard Shaw We know the truth, not only by the reason, but also by the heart.
-- Blaise Pascal, Thoughts, Chap. x. 1., Translated by O. W. Wight For best results: wash in cold water separately, hang dry and iron with warm iron. For not so good
results: drag behind car through puddles, blow-dry on roofrack.
-- Laundry instructions on a shirt "Posterity: you will never know how much it has cost my generation to preserve your freedom. I hope you will make good use of it." (John Quincy Adams) Musicians It is always right that a man should be able to render a reason for the faith that is within him.
-- Sydney Smith "Nothing has been purchased more dearly than the little bit of reason and sense of freedom which now constitutes our pride." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Luck is the residue of design.
- Branch Rickey - former owner of the Brooklyn Dodger Baseball Team Musicians
Who, being loved, is poor?
-- Oscar Wilde A government is the only known vessel that leaks from the top.
-- James Reston I think that I shall never see
A billboard lovely as a tree.
Indeed, unless the billboards fall,
I'll never see a tree at all.
-- Ogden Nash, Song of the Open Road, 1945 If all men were brothers, would you let one marry your sister? For a male and female to live continuously together is...biologically speaking, an extremely
unnatural condition.
-- Robert Briffault Musicians Everything is drive-through. In California, they even have a burial service called Jump-In-The-
Box.
-- Wil Shriner Marriage: A ceremony in which rings are put on the finger of the lady and around the hands and feet of the man. "Dying is the most embarrassing thing that can ever happen to you, because someone's got to take care of all your details." (Andy Warhol, America, 1985) Musicians
There is a coherent plan in the universe, though I don't know what it's a plan for.
-- Fred Hoyle Defeat is not the worst of failures. Not to have tried is the true failure.
-- George E. Woodberry Love is an ocean of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses.
-- Lord Dewar The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other
is ready.
-- Henry David Thoreau >From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some
day I intend reading it.
-- Groucho Marx Musicians In great matters men show themselves as they wish to be seen; in small matters, as they are.
-- Gamaliel Bradford This delivery driver carries no money. His wife has it all. "There is no sin except stupidity." (Oscar Wilde) Musicians
My grandfather once told me that there are two kinds of people: those who work and those who
take the credit. He told me to try to be in the first group; there was less competition there.
-- INDIRA When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find
that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our
pain "The man who lets himself be bored is even more contemptible than the bore." (Samuel Butler) "As long as people will accept crap, it will be financially profitable to dispense it." (Dick Cavett) To believe in something, and not to live it, is dishonest.
-- Ghandi Musicians Marriage is a trip between Niagara Falls and Reno. "A man of genius makes no mistakes; his errors are volitional and are the portals of discovery." (James Joyce) Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has not heart; and any man who is over 30, and is
not a conservative, has no brains.
-- Winston Churchill Musicians
A leader in the Democratic Party is a boss, in the Republican Party he is a leader.
Harry S. Truman The advice your son rejected is now being given by him to your grandson. The health of the people is really the foundation upon which all their happiness and all their
powers as a State depend.
-- Benjamin Disraeli I've sometimes thought of marrying, and then I've thought again.
-- Noel Coward blah "Each friend represents a world in us; a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only in meeting them that a new world is born." (Anais Nin) Musicians "When wealth is lost, nothing is lost; when health is lost, something is lost; when character is lost, all is lost." (Billy Graham) In view of all the deadly computer viruses that have been spreading lately, Weekend Update
would like to remind you: when you link up to another computer, you're linking up to every
computer that th Marriage is like a cage--one sees the birds outside desperate to get in and those inside equally
desparate to get out.
-- Di Peatlins Musicians
Whatever you are from nature, keep to it; never desert your own line of talent. Be what nature
intended you for, and you will succeed; be anything else, and you will be ten thousands times
worse tha As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.
-- Proverbs 23:7 One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do
what he was afraid he couldn't do.
-- Henry Ford I skate to where the puck is going to be, not to where it has been.
-- Wayne Gretzky Happy are those who dream dreams and are willing to pay the price to make them come true.
-- Anon. Musicians If the government wants people to respect the law, it should set a better example.
-- Anon. "Every act of violence increases the recruitment of terrorists. Iraq has been turned into a base of terror." (Noam Chomsky, from The Toronto Star, March 23, 2004) The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. But not in that order.
-- Brian Pickrell Musicians
You can observe a lot by watching.
-- Yogi Berra There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well written or badly written.
-- Oscar Wilde The worth of the state, in the long run, is the worth of the individuals composing it.
-- John Stuart Mill "I was born lost and take no pleasure in being found..." (John Steinbeck, Travels With Charley) A wasted youth is better by far than a wise and productive old age.
-- Meat Loaf, from the song "Wasted Youth" on the album Bat Out of Hell II Musicians The voice of the intellect is a soft one, but it does not rest till it has gained a hearing.
-- Sigmund Freud This is the miracle that happens every time to those who really love; the more they give, the more
they possess.
-- Rainer Maria Rilke Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft...and the only one that can be mass
produced with unskilled labor.
-- Wernher von Braun Musicians
Where there is love there is life.
-- Gandhi Teach a parrot the terms "supply and demand" and you've got an economist.
-- Thomas Carlyle The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
- Mark Twain Truth is more of a stranger than fiction.
-- Mark Twain Marriage is low down, but you spend the rest of your life paying for it. Musicians If you want anything done well, do it yourself. This is why most people laugh at their own jokes.
-- Bob Edwards You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was
60. She's 97 today and we don't know where the hell she is.
-- Ellen DeGeneres Executive ability is deciding quickly and getting someone else to do the work.
-- John G. Pollard Musicians
You are educated when you have the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your
temper or self-confidence.
-- Robert Frost Is it better for a woman to marry a man who loves her than a man she loves.
-- Anonymous The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing -- and then marry him.
-- Cher Don't worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good, you'll have to ram them
down people's throats.
-- Howard Aiken Live out of your imagination, not your history.
-- Stephen Covey Musicians Talk to a man about himself and he will listen for hours.
-- Benjamin Disraeli You can only find truth with logic if you have already found truth without it.
- Gilbert Keith Chesterton I tried a mail order bride, once, but she was damaged in the mail, and I had to return the unused part for my full refund. Musicians
Asking politicians to vote themselves out of power is like asking rabbits not to multiply, it ain't
natural.
-- Bob Beckel, on term limits, CBS This Morning, 3/30/95 It is no use walking anywhere to preach unless our walking is our preaching.
-- St. Francis of Assisi An act of love that fails is just as much a part of the divine life as an act of love that succeeds, for
love is measured by fullness, not by reception.
-- Harold Loukes It ain't what we don't know that gives us trouble, it's what we know that ain't so.
-- Will Rogers The only thing worse than a man you can't control is a man you can.
-- Margo Kaufman Musicians What's new? Most of my wife. All television is children's television.
-- Richard P. Adler "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." (Franklin Delano Roosevelt, 1882 - 1945, 32nd U.S. President) Musicians
