Love matches are made by people who are content, for a month of honey, to condemn
themselves to a life of vinegar.
-- Countess of Blessington "We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then is not an act but a habit." (Aristotle) By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. -- Socrates I do not believe in an afterlife, although I am bringing a change of underwear.
-- Woody Allen Vote early and vote often.
- Al Capone Z The public have an insatiable curiosity to know everything. Except what is worth knowing.
Journalism, conscious of this, and having tradesman-like habits, supplies their demands.
-- Oscar Wilde "A friendship that exacts oneness of opinion and conduct is not worth much." (Mohandas Gandhi, In Search of the Supreme) To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance
- Oscar Wilde Z
I don't feel good.
-- Luther Burbank, dying words If all economists were laid end to end, they would not reach a conclusion.
-- George Bernard Shaw "Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991) The society of women is the element of good manners.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is
terribly important.
-- Bertrand Russell Z "Ideas are far more powerful than guns. We don't allow our enemies to have guns, why should we allow them to have ideas?" (Josef Stalin) Question: If you could live forever, would you and why? Answer: I would not live forever, because
we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live
forever, The promises of maniacs, like those of women, are not safely relied upon.
-- Joseph Heller, God Knows Z
"Most people would rather die than think; in fact, they do so." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) I have an existential map; it has 'you are here' written all over it.
- Steven Wright The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness, can be trained to do most things.
-- Jilly Cooper I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to.
-- Elvis Presley It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.
-- Andre Gide Z He who hesitates is a damned fool.
- Mae West Go on, get out. Last words are for fools who haven't said enough.
-- Karl Marx, dying words to his housekeeper "Even a stopped clock is right twice a day." (Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach) Z
When yer in a funk, people in love are a royal pain in the patookus.
-- Portnoy, character in "Outland," comic strip by Berkely Breathed There's too much blood in my caffeine system.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker "I met someone on the street who said wasn't it great that we're going to have a movie star for president, that it was so Pop, and (laughs) when you think about it like that, it is great, it's so Amer If a man does his best, what else is there?
- General George S. Patton "True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until it is lost." (Charles Caleb Colton) Z You can't learn too soon that the most useful thing about a principle is that it can always be
sacrificed to expediency.
-- W. Somerset Maugham It is never too late to be what you might have been.
-- George Eliot I've always thought that underpopulated countries in Africa are vastly underpolluted.
-- Lawrence Summers, chief economist of the World Bank, explaining why we should export toxic
wastes to Third Wo Z
The best time to hold your tongue is the time you feel you must say something or bust.
-- Josh Billings Computers will not be perfected until they can compute how much more than the estimate the job
will cost.
-- Anon Virtue is not left to stand alone. He who practices it will have neighbors.
-- Confucius The nice thing about being a celebrity is that if you bore people they think it's their fault.
- Henry Kissinger I do not like broccoli. And I haven't liked it since I was a little kid and my mother made me eat it.
And I'm President of the United States and I'm not going to eat any more broccoli.
-- George Bus Z Standing in the middle of the road is very dangerous; you get knocked down by the traffic from
both sides.
-- Margaret Thatcher There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.
- Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977 Learn to laugh at your troubles and you'll never run out of things to laugh at.
-- Lyn Karol Z
We live at a time when man believes himself fabulously capable of creation, but he does not
know what to create.
-- Jose Ortega y Gasset It depends on your definition of asleep. They were not stretched out. They had their eyes closed.
They were seated at their desks with their heads in a nodding position.
-- John Hogan, Commonwealth "The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time." (Abraham Lincoln, 1809-65) "Avoid providing material for the drama that is always stretched tight between parents and children; it uses up much of the children's strength and wastes the love of the elders, which acts and warms For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-
knowing.
- Henry Louis Mencken Z "Death is only a launching into the region of the strange Untried; it is but the first salutation to the possibilities of the immense Remote, the Wild, the Watery, the Unshored..." (Herman Melville, "The most instructive experiences are those of everyday life." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) I do not believe in an afterlife, although I am bringing a change of underwear.
-- Woody Allen Z
No man should marry until he has studied anatomy and dissected at least one woman. -- Honore de Balzac A Sunday school is a prison in which children do penance for the evil conscience of their parents.
-- H. L. Mencken Show my head to the people, it is worth seeing.
-- Georges Danton, to his executioner Republican boys date Democratic girls. They plan to marry Republican girls, but feel they're
entitled to a little fun first.
-- Anonymous Women: If they're not turning down your proposals for marriage, they're accusing you of
suspicious behavior in the women's lingerie changing room.
-- Cliff Clavin, character on "Cheers", U.S. Televi Z "I run to see who has the most guts." (Steve Roland Prefontaine) "The greatest pleasure in life is doing what others say you cannot do." (Anonymous) In this world of sin and sorrow there is always something to be thankful for; as for me, I rejoice
that I am not a Republican.
-- H. L. Mencken Z
Now comes the mystery.
-- Henry Ward Beecher, dying words, March 8, 1887 "Sometimes I think it's another sign of the sad necessity of our crowded, lonely lives, an urgent hopeless reaching out to touch something real, a deep hunger for something authentic when everything s A person is not given integrity. It results from the relentless pursuit of honesty at all times.
-- Anon. "Teacher played hooky. Sent message: 'Receiving instruction. Enjoying myself thoroughly. See you next week.'" (John Cage, M, Writings 1967 - 1972) Skepticism is the chastity of the intellect, and it is shameful to surrender it too soon or to the first
comer: there is nobility in preserving it coolly and proudly through long youth, until at last Z "I want my food dead. Not sick, not dying, dead." (Oscar Wilde) Silence is argument carried out by other means.
- ErnestoCheGuevara An economic forecaster is like a cross-eyed javelin thrower: they don't win many accuracy
contests, but they keep the crowd's attention.
-- Anonymous Z
If your wife wants to learn how to drive, don't stand in her way. Time is at once the most valuable and most perishable of all our possessions.
-- John Randolph What kills a skunk is the publicity it gives itself.
-- Abraham Lincoln I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them.
- Ian L. Fleming Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper. Z "The masses are far more likely to believe a big lie than several small ones." (Adolf Hitler) Love is like pi - natural, irrational, and very important.
-- Lisa Hoffman There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as
though everything is a miracle.
-- Albert Einstein Z
Free will is a golden thread running through the frozen matrix of fixed events.
-- Robert A. Heinlein _The Rolling Stones_ "I know that God won't give me more trouble than I can handle ... but sometimes I wish he wouldn't trust me so much." (Mother Teresa) A clever man commits no minor blunders.
- Goethe To love another person is to help them love God.
-- Søren Kierkegaard Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you an
automobile.
-- Billy Sunday Z Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous
and dreadful.
-- Samuel Johnson Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.
- H. G. Wells If it is not right do not do it; if it is not true do not say it.
-- Marcus Aurelius Z
Life is ours to be spent, not to be saved.
-- D.H. Lawrence A coward is a hero with a wife, kids, and a mortgage.
-- Marvin Kitman "The most beautiful things in the world are the most useless, peacocks and lilies, for instance." (John Ruskin) You must first have a lot of patience to learn to have patience.
-- Stanislaw J. Lec "When a girl marries, she exchanges the attentions of all the other men of her acquaintance for the inattention of just one." (Helen Rowland) Z Love and work are the cornerstones of our humanness.
-- Sigmund Freud "The masses are far more likely to believe a big lie than several small ones." (Adolf Hitler) Of the seven dwarves, only Dopey had a shaven face. This should tell us something about the
custom of shaving.
-- Tom Robbins, Skinny Legs and All Z
