Long engagements give people the opportunity of finding out each other's character before
marriage, which is never advisable.
-- Oscar Wilde Ninety percent of the game is half mental.
-- Yogi Berra If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough.
- Mario Andretti All human actions are equivalent... and... all are on principle doomed...
-- Jean-Paul Sartre, "Being and Nothingness" I don't even butter my bread; I consider that cooking.
-- Katherine Cebrian Transport Salaried Staffs' Association The philosophy exam was a piece of cake -- which was a bit of a surprise, actually, because I
was expecting some questions on a sheet of paper.
-- Smith & Jones "Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night." (Edger Allen Poe) "I'll endorse with my name any of the following; clothing AC-DC, cigarettes, small tapes, sound equipment, ROCK N' ROLL RECORDS, anything, film, and film equipment, Food, Helium, Whips, MONEY!!" (And Transport Salaried Staffs' Association
"College: two hundred people reading same book. An obvious mistake. Two hundred people can read two hundred books." (John Cage, M, Writings 1967 - 1972) "I met someone on the street who said wasn't it great that we're going to have a movie star for president, that it was so Pop, and (laughs) when you think about it like that, it is great, it's so Amer Why are women so much more interesting to men than men are to women?
-- Virginia Woolf A man sits with a pretty girl for an hour, it seems like a minute. He sits on a hot stove for a
minute, it's longer than any hour. That is relativity.
-- Albert Einstein Live TV died in the late 1950s, electronic bulletin boards came along in the mid-1980s, meaning
there was about a 25-year gap when it was difficult to put your foot in your mouth and have
people all Transport Salaried Staffs' Association The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.
- Samuel Johnson Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.
- H. G. Wells Not only is there no God, but try finding a plumber on Sunday.
-- Woody Allen Transport Salaried Staffs' Association
The only weapon that becomes sharper with constant use is the tongue.
-- Anonymous Hark, the Herald Tribune sings,
Advertising wondrous things!
-- Tom Lehrer It is a miracle that curiosity survives formal education.
-- Albert Einstein The average person thinks he isn't.
- Father Larry Lorenzoni If we may believe our logicians, man is distinguished from all other creatures by the
faculty of laughter.
-- Joseph Addison Transport Salaried Staffs' Association I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, "I'd like some fries." The girl at the counter said,
"Would you like some fries with that?"
-- Jay Leno I would venture to guess that Anon, who wrote so many poems without signing them, was often a
woman.
-- Virginia Woolf Democracy means simply the bludgeoning of the people by the people for the people.
-- Oscar Wilde Transport Salaried Staffs' Association
All television is children's television.
-- Richard P. Adler The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.
-- Tom Clancy Logic is in the eye of the logician.
- Gloria Steinem Feeding the hungry is a greater work than raising the dead.
-- Saint John Chrysostom A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.
- Frank Lloyd Wright Transport Salaried Staffs' Association Friendship is like money, easier made than kept.
-- Samuel Butler Courage is the price that Love exacts for granting peace.
-- Amelia Earhart I am going to put myself to sleep now for a bit longer than usual. Call the time Eternity." (Jerzy Kosinski, Polish novelist, from his suicide note) Transport Salaried Staffs' Association
A behaviorist is someone who pulls habits out of rats.
-- Anonymous We would often be sorry if our wishes were gratified.
-- Aesop Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein No, that is the great fallacy; the wisdom of old men. They do not grow wise. They grow careful." (Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell To Arms) A man must marry only a very pretty woman in case he should ever want some other man to take her off his hands. -- Guitry Transport Salaried Staffs' Association Elegance of language may not be in the power of all of us; but simplicity and straight forwardness
are. Write much as you would speak; speak as you think. If with your inferior, speak no coarser
tha "There is only one success: to be able to spend your life in your own way, and not to give others absurd maddening claims upon it." (Christopher Darlington Morley) Love is like the measles. The older you get it, the worse the attack.
-- Mary Roberts Rhinehart Transport Salaried Staffs' Association
The IRS spends God knows how much of your tax money on these toll-free information hot lines
staffed by IRS employees, whose idea of a dynamite tax tip is that you should print neatly. If you
ask th "The want of logic annoys. Too much logic bores. Life eludes logic, and everything that logic alone constructs remains artificial and forced." (André Gide) A White House well filled, a little peanut field well tilled, and a wife who will go to the Bronx are
great riches.
-- Poor Jimmy's Almanac Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.
-- Paul Boese Nothing says loving like marrying your cousin! -- Al Bundy Transport Salaried Staffs' Association "We have to be able to criticise what we love, to say what we have to say 'cause if your not trying to make something better, than as far as I can tell, you are just in the way." (Ani Difranco) "If I work toward an end, meantime I am confined to a process. The rainbow is more beautiful than the pot at the end of it, because the rainbow is now. And the pot never turns out to be quite what I e "The only real mistake is the one from which we learn nothing." (John Powell) Transport Salaried Staffs' Association
Marriage is a lottery in which men stake their liberty and women their happiness.
-- Madame de Rieux "Even death is unreliable. Instead of zero it may be some ghastly hallucination, such as the square root of minus one." (Samuel Beckett) "People drag their progeny around with them like a ball and chain, like some terrible deadweight that hinders their every move - and that, as often as not, effectively winds up killing them." (Michel Obstacles cannot crush me. Every obstacle yields to stern resolve. He who is fixed to a star does
not change his mind.
-- Leonardo da Vinci, Notebooks Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.
- H. G. Wells Transport Salaried Staffs' Association "The greatest of faults, I should say, is to be conscious of none." (Thomas Carlyle, 1795-1881) Behind every great fortune there is a crime.
- Honore de Balzac You can close your eyes to reality, but not to memories.
-- Stanislaw J. Lem Transport Salaried Staffs' Association
Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop
questioning.
-- Albert Einstein Motivation will almost always beat mere talent.
-- Norman R. Augustine Hardly a year passes that fails to find a new, oft-times exotic, research method or technique
added to the armamentarium of political inquiry. Anyone who cannot negotiate Chi squares,
assess randomi "Children spell love...T-I-M-E." (Dr. Anthony P. Witham) Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that
can be shot when it breaks down.
-- Russell Baker Transport Salaried Staffs' Association I married beneath me. All women do.
-- Lady Nancy Astor, attributed Mother-in-law: A woman who destroys her son-in-law's peace of mind by giving him a piece of
hers.
-- Anonymous Democracy is a government where you can say what you think even if you don't think.
-- Anon. Transport Salaried Staffs' Association
"Character is determined more by the lack of certain experiences than by those one has had." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience. Govern a family as you would cook a small fish - very gently.
-- Chinese Proverb Value your words. Each one may be the last.
-- Stanislaw J. Lec The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.
-- Lily Tomlin Transport Salaried Staffs' Association "I met someone on the street who said wasn't it great that we're going to have a movie star for president, that it was so Pop, and (laughs) when you think about it like that, it is great, it's so Amer The difference between pornography and erotica is lighting.
-- Gloria Leonard The whole art of teaching is only the art of awakening the natural curiosity of young minds for the
purpose of satisfying it afterwards.
-- Anatole France Transport Salaried Staffs' Association
Democracy means simply the bludgeoning of the people by the people for the people.
-- Oscar Wilde "You make 'em, I amuse 'em." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991, on children) The closer I'm bound in love to you, the closer I am to free.
-- Indigo Girls, song lyric Hell is a half-filled auditorium.
-- Robert Frost You have a cough? Go home tonight, eat a whole box of Ex-Lax--tomorrow you'll be afraid to
cough.
-- Pearl Williams Transport Salaried Staffs' Association "Better is the enemy of good." (Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire, 1694-1778) Everything is drive-through. In California, they even have a burial service called Jump-In-The-
Box.
-- Wil Shriner Abstract art: a product of the untalented sold by the unprincipled to the utterly bewildered.
-- Al Capp Transport Salaried Staffs' Association
Art and science have their meeting point in method.
-- Edward Bulwer-Lytton It ain't what we don't know that gives us trouble, it's what we know that ain't so.
-- Will Rogers "It seems to me that if you or I must choose between two courses of thought or action, we should remember our dying and try so to live that our death brings no pleasure on the world." (John Steinbeck Anyone who considers arithmetical methods of producing random digits is, of course, in a state of
sin.
-- John Von Neuman Before you put on a frown, make absolutely sure there are no smiles available.
-- Jim Beggs Transport Salaried Staffs' Association When one is trying to do something beyond his known powers it is useless to seek the approval
of friends. Friends are at their best in moments of defeat.
-- Henry Miller "Transport of the mails, transport of the human voice, transport of flickering pictures--in this century as in others our highest accomplishments still have the single aim of bringing men together." I belong to Bridegrooms Anonymous. Whenever I feel like getting married, they send over a lady
in a housecoat and hair curlers to burn my toast for me.
-- Dick Martin Transport Salaried Staffs' Association
