Never look at the trombones. You'll only encourage them.
-- Richard Strauss, on conducting Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you? But when you take him in
a car he sticks his head out the window.
-- Steve Bluestone Why are women so much more interesting to men than men are to women?
-- Virginia Woolf A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.
-- Michel de Montaigne There is no sincerer love than the love of food.
-- George Bernard Shaw News and Media "I know that God won't give me more trouble than I can handle ... but sometimes I wish he wouldn't trust me so much." (Mother Teresa) In marriage, the bridge gets a shower. But for the groom, it's curtains! "A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized." (Fred Allen) News and Media
Genius is an African who dreams up snow.
-- Vladimir Nabokov The weirder you're going to behave, the more normal you should look. It works in reverse, too.
When I see a kid with three or four rings in his nose, I know there is absolutely nothing
extraordinary Show my head to the people, it is worth seeing.
-- Georges Danton, to his executioner "I want my food dead. Not sick, not dying, dead." (Oscar Wilde) "Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishments." (Anonymous) News and Media The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes What we anticipate seldom occurs: but what we least expect generally happens.
-- Benjamin Disraeli A problem is a chance for you to do your best.
-- Buke Ellington News and Media
"Goodwill is the only asset that competition cannot undersell or destroy." (Mrshall Field, businessman and philanthropist) Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
-- George Clemenceau Your goals, minus your doubts, equal your reality.
-- Ralph Marston Of the seven dwarves, only Dopey had a shaven face. This should tell us something about the
custom of shaving.
-- Tom Robbins, Skinny Legs and All Vitality shows in not only the ability to persist but the ability to start over.
-- F. Scott Fitzgerald News and Media If pleasures are greatest in anticipation, just remember that this is also true of trouble.
-- Elbert Hubbard When yer in a funk, people in love are a royal pain in the patookus.
-- Portnoy, character in "Outland," comic strip by Berkely Breathed "A friendship that exacts oneness of opinion and conduct is not worth much." (Mohandas Gandhi, In Search of the Supreme) News and Media
As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.
-- Proverbs 23:7 "One often contradicts an opinion when what is uncongenial is really the tone in which it was conveyed." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "Great indebtedness does not make men grateful, but vengeful; and if a little charity is not forgotten, it turns into a gnawing worm." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Thus Spake Zarathustra) "Even death is unreliable. Instead of zero it may be some ghastly hallucination, such as the square root of minus one." (Samuel Beckett) There is no reason for any individual to have a computer in his home.
-- Kenneth H. Olson, President of DEC, Convention of the World Future Society, 1977 News and Media Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson "For better or for worse, our company (The News Corporation Ltd.) is a reflection of my thinking, my character, my values." (Keith Rupert Murdoch, media mogul, 1931-) To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.
-- Oscar Wilde News and Media
Viewed from the summit of reason, all life looks like a malignant disease and the world like a
madhouse.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe In a novel, the hero can lay ten girls and marry a virgin for the finish. In a movie, that is not
allowed. The villain can lay anybody he wants, have as much fun and as he wants cheating,
stealing, The difference between pornography and erotica is lighting.
-- Gloria Leonard Matters of religion should never be matters of controversy. We neither argue with a lover about
his taste, not condemn him, if we are just, for knowing so human a passion.
-- George Santayana There is a courtesy of the heart; it is allied to love. From it springs the purest courtesy in the
outward behavior.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe News and Media Do or do not. There is no try.
-- Yoda, character in the movie The Empire Strikes Back It is much more comfortable to be mad and know it, than to be sane and have one's doubts.
- G. B. Burgin What I have to say is far more important than how long my eyelashes are.
-- Alanis Morissette, singer, 1995 News and Media
There is no cure for birth and death save to enjoy the interval.
-- George Santayana "Self confidence is the first requisite to great undertakings." (Samuel Johnson) A poem is never finished, only abandoned.
-- Paul Valery The fate of love is that it always seems too little or too much.
-- Anonymous "He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever." (Chinese Proverb) News and Media As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; and as far as they are
certain, they do not refer to reality.
-- Albert Einstein Republican boys date Democratic girls. They plan to marry Republican girls, but feel they're
entitled to a little fun first.
-- Anonymous The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other
is ready.
-- Henry David Thoreau News and Media
Wife: The perfect acquisition for any gentleman feeling himself to have excessive control over his personal affairs. The real test of friendship is: Can you literally do nothing with the other person? Can you enjoy
together those moments of life that are utterly simple? They are the moments people looks back
on at "God is a gentleman. He prefers blondes." (Joe Orton, Loot) You cannot think about thinking, without thinking about thinking about something.
-- Seymour Papert A conclusion is the place where you got tired thinking.
-- Martin H. Fischer News and Media To love another person is to help them love God.
-- Søren Kierkegaard Value your words. Each one may be the last.
-- Stanislaw J. Lec A girl must marry for love and keep on marrying until she finds it.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor News and Media
"And on the seventh day, God stepped back and said 'There is my creation, perfect in every way ... oh, damn it, I left pot all over the place. Now they'll think I want them to smoke it. Now I have to Value your words. Each one may be the last.
-- Stanislaw J. Lec The time is always right to do what is right.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: It goes on.
-- Robert Frost Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through
self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.
-- Helen Keller News and Media "When wealth is lost, nothing is lost; when health is lost, something is lost; when character is lost, all is lost." (Billy Graham) The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. What is called resignation is confirmed
desperation.
-- Henry David Thoreau, Walden (1854) Sleep is an excellent way of listening to an opera.
- James Stephens News and Media
There is a coherent plan in the universe, though I don't know what it's a plan for.
-- Fred Hoyle If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough.
- Mario Andretti Change before you have to.
-- Jack Welch "REASONABLE, adj. Accessible to the infection of our own opinions. Hospitable to persuasion, dissuasion and evasion." (Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary) See what will happen if you don't stop biting your fingernails?
-- Will Rogers, to his niece on seeing the Venus de Milo News and Media Marriage was all a woman's idea and for man's acceptance of the pretty yoke, it becomes us to
be grateful.
-- Phyllis McGinley He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose
-- Jim Elliott I am ready at any time. Do not keep me waiting.
-- John Brown - last words News and Media
Live TV died in the late 1950s, electronic bulletin boards came along in the mid-1980s, meaning
there was about a 25-year gap when it was difficult to put your foot in your mouth and have
people all What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death.
-- Dave Barry Two souls with but a single thought,
Two hearts that beat as one.
-- Fredrich Halm A leader in the Democratic Party is a boss, in the Republican Party he is a leader.
Harry S. Truman Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
- George Burns News and Media "Any intelligent woman who reads the marriage contract, and then goes into it, deserves all the consequences." (Isadora Duncan) "We're all proud of making little mistakes. It gives us the feeling we don't make any big ones." (Andrew A. Rooney) If other people are going to talk, conversation becomes impossible.
-- James McNeill Whistler News and Media
Every calling is great when greatly pursued.
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes Statistics have shown that mortality increases perceptibly in the military during wartime.
-- Alphonse Allais She felt in italics and thought in capitals.
-- Henry James Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves.
-- Abraham Lincoln "I don't use drugs, my dreams are frightening enough." (M. C. Escher) News and Media I just need enough to tide me over until I need more.
-- Bill Hoest Natural ability without education has more often attained to glory and virtue than education
without natural ability.
Cicero (106 BC - 43 BC) Hope, like faith, is nothing if it is not courageous; it is nothing if it is not ridiculous.
-- Thornton Wilder News and Media
