"Is man merely a mistake of God's? Or God merely a mistake of man's?" (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "Over grown military establishments are under any form of government inauspicious to liberty, and are to be regarded as particularly hostile to republican liberty." (George Washington) Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.
-- Mother Teresa "Careful?! Was my mother careful when she stabbed me in the heart with a coat hanger while I was still in the womb?" (Trey Parker) You have to walk carefully in the beginning of love; the running across fields into your lover's
arms can only come later when you're sure they won't laugh if you trip.
-- Jonathan Carroll, Outside W Cliches should be avoided like the plague.
-- Anon. Miracles occur naturally as expressions of love. The real miracle is the love that inspires them. In
this sense everything that comes from love is a miracle.
-- Marianne Williamson "Most people don't realize that large pieces of coral, which have been painted brown and attached to the skull by common wood screws, can make a child look like a deer." (Jack Handey) W
Of course there's a lot of knowledge in universities: the freshmen bring a little in; the seniors don't
take much away, so knowledge sort of accumulates...
-- Anonymous It is well, when judging a friend, to remember that he is judging you with the same godlike and
superior impartiality.
-- Arnold Bennett In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that
no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite.
-- Paul Dirac Lawyers are... operators of the toll bridge which anyone in search of justice must pass.
-- Jane Bryant Quinn Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
-- Erma Bombeck W The less their ability, the more their conceit.
Ahad HaAm Experience is the worst teacher; it gives the test before presenting the lesson.
-- Vernon Law For a male and female to live continuously together is...biologically speaking, an extremely
unnatural condition.
-- Robert Briffault W
At every crossroads on the path that leads to the future, tradition has placed 10,000 men to guard
the past.
-- Maurice Maeterlink After finding no qualified candidates for the position of principal, the school board is extremely
pleased to announce the appointment of David Steele to the post.
-- Philip Streifer, Superintendent These people have served a longer sentence than some people who have committed murder.
-- Jeff Greenfield, news analyst, describing the jury in the OJ Simpson murder trial, 1995 To take what there "is", and use it, without waiting forever in vain for the preconceived - to dig
deep into the actual and get something out of that - this doubtless is the right way to live.
-- H The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline
luggage.
-- Mark Russell W "The want of logic annoys. Too much logic bores. Life eludes logic, and everything that logic alone constructs remains artificial and forced." (André Gide) "When you have nothing to say, say nothing." (Charles Caleb Colton) If I tell a lie it's only because I think I'm telling the truth.
-- Phil Gaglardi, Minister of Highways, British Columbia, Canada W
"Every now and then say, 'What the fu(c)k.' 'What the fu(c)k' gives you freedom. Freedom brings opportunity. Opportunity makes your future." (Curtis Armstrong, Risky Business, 1983) If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens?
- Seymour Cray (1925-1996), father of supercomputing "Man looks in the abyss, there's nothing staring back at him. At that moment, man finds his character. And that is what keeps him out of the abyss." (Hal Holbrook, Wallstreet) Most rock journalism is people who can't write interviewing people who can't talk for people who
can't read.
-- Frank Zappa There are not enough Indians in the world to defeat the Seventh Cavalry.
-- George Armstrong Custer W An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field.
-- Niels Bohr Marriage is not a ritual or an end. It is a long, intricate, intimate dance together and nothing
matters more than your own sense of balance and your choice of partner.
-- Amy Bloom Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you? But when you take him in
a car he sticks his head out the window.
-- Steve Bluestone W
Marriage is the process of finding out what kind of man your wife would have preferred. Husbands are like fires. They go out if unattended.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor Grow old with me! The best is yet to be!
-- Robert Browning There's many a bestseller that could have been prevented by a good teacher.
-- Flannery O'Connor "I think you should defend to the death their right to march, and then go down and meet them with baseball bats." (Woody Allen, in regard to the KKK) W "We have been the cowards lobbing cruise missiles from 2,000 miles away. That's cowardly. Staying in the airplane when it hits the building, say what you want about it, it's not cowardly." (Bill Mahe Marriage is the sole cause of divorce. Things are more like they are now than they ever were before.
-- Dwight D. Eisenhower, U.S. President W
It is amazing at how small a price may the wedding ring be placed upon a worthless hand; but, by
the beauty of our law, what heaps of gold are indispensable to take it off!
-- Douglas Jerold, 1858 Flowers are words which even a baby can understand.
-- Arthur C. Coxe There is no reason for any individual to have a computer in his home.
-- Kenneth H. Olson, President of DEC, Convention of the World Future Society, 1977 The nourishment is palatable.
-- Millard Fillmore, dying words "The perception of beauty is a moral test." (Henry David Thoreau) W When looking back, usually I'm more sorry for the things I didn't do than for the things I shouldn't
have done.
-- Malcolm Forbes The democratic theory is that if you accumulate enough ignorance at the polls, you produce
intelligence.
-- Philo Vance An ideal wife is one who remains faithful to you but tries to be just as charming as if she weren't.
-- Sacha Guitry W
Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.
-- George Santayana The higher up you go, the more mistakes you are allowed. Right at the top, if you make enough of
them, it's considered to be your style.
-- Fred Astaire "Boredom is a vital problem for the moralist, since at least half the sins of mankind are caused by the fear of it." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) Having a family is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain.
-- Martin Mull A behaviorist is someone who pulls habits out of rats.
-- Anonymous W When a cat is dropped, it always lands on its feet, and when toast is dropped, it always lands with
the buttered side down. I propose to strap buttered toast to the back of a cat; the 2 will hover,
blah "There is a melancholy that stems from greatness." (Sébastien-Roch Nicolas Chamfort, 1740/41-1794) The best defense is a good offense.
-- Anonymous W
"We the people are the rightful masters of both Congress and the courts, not to overthrow the Constitution but to overthrow the men who pervert the Constitution." (Abraham Lincoln, 1809-65) An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field.
-- Niels Bohr "'Contrariwise,' continued Tweedledee, 'if it was so, it might be, and if it were so, it would be; but as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic!'" (Lewis Carroll, Through the Looking Glass) Convictions are more dangerous enemies of truth than lies.
-- Friedrich Nietzsche The only way to entertain some folks is to listen to them.
-- Kin Hubbard W Do not fear to be eccentric in opinion, for every opinion now accepted was once eccentric.
-- Bertrand Russell "Is life not a thousand times too short for us to bore ourselves?" (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) My good intentions are completely lethal.
-- Margaret Atwood W
I don't know if God exists, but it would be better for His reputation if He didn't.
-- Jules Renard "Babies are necessary to grown-ups. A new baby is like the beginning of all things--wonder, hope, a dream of possibilities. In a world that is cutting down its trees to build highways, losing its eart Honor the ocean of love.
-- George de Benneville "Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something." (Plato, 427 BC-348) Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
-- Erma Bombeck W The authority of those who teach is often an obstacle to those who want to learn.
-- Cicero "We're an embarrasment to college graduates across America." (James Douglas Morrison, lead singer of The Doors) Infatuation is when you think that he's as sexy as Robert Redford, as smart as Henry Kissinger,
as noble as Ralph Nader, as funny as Woody Allen, and as athletic as Jimmy Conners. Love is
when you r W
A narcissist is someone better-looking than you are.
-- Gore Vidal Teaching is not a lost art, but the regard for it is a losttradition.
-- Jacques Barzun Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you
underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.
-- Matt Groening, Love is Hell Love is temporary insanity curable by marriage.
-- Ambrose Bierce English Law prohibits a man from marrying his mother-in-law. This is our idea of useless legislation. W More light!
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, dying words "Life is a great surprise. I don't see why death should not be an even greater one." (Vladimir Nabokov) "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." (Oscar Wilde) W
"I either want less corruption, or more chance to participate in it." (Ashleigh Brilliant) Life is not an easy matter.... You cannot live through it without falling into frustration and cynicism
unless you have before you a great idea which raises you above personal misery, above
weakness The great thing in this world is not so much where we stand as in what direction we are going.
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes I'm not dumb, I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.
-- Calvin True thinkers are characterised by a blending of clearness and mystery.
-- Victor Hugo W Marriage is low down, but you spend the rest of your life paying for it. "If you want a thing done well, do it yourself." (Napoleon Bonaparte) What's another word for "Thesaurus?"
-- Steven Wright W
