If you put garbage in a computer nothing comes out but garbage. But this garbage, having
passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow ennobled and none dare criticize it.
-- Anonymous We are all here for a spell; get all the good laughs you can.
-- Will Rogers "The sickness of our times for me has been just this damn thing that everything has been getting smaller and smaller and less and less important, that the romantic spirit has dried up, that there is n The paradox is really the pathos of intellectual life and just as only great souls are exposed to
passions it is only the great thinker who is exposed to what I call paradoxes, which are . . .
grand It's impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
-- Woody Allen Z Experience is not what happens to you; it's what you do with what happens to you.
-- Aldous Huxley God help the man who won't marry until he finds a perfect woman, and God help him still more if
he finds her.
-- Benjamin Tillett I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way
around Chinatown.
-- Woody Allen Z
No woman marries for money; they are all clever enough, before marrying a millionaire, to fall in
love with him first.
-- Cesare Pavese I just need enough to tide me over until I need more.
-- Bill Hoest If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.
-- Scott Adams Democracy is a government where you can say what you think even if you don't think.
-- Anon. Marriage is low down, but you spend the rest of your life paying for it.
-- Baskins Z Man is the only animal that laughs and has a state legislature.
-- Samuel Butler "Use what talents you possess; The woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best." (William Blake) America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room. Every time it wags its tail, it knocks over a
chair.
-- Arnold Toynbee Z
"Our lives are repetitious shams--every single day a simulacrum of the previous day. So for Man, he is out to pepper his daily activities with different things--he's fighting against boredom." (Matth blah bl "The better the state is established, the fainter is humanity." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) The older one grows, the more one likes indecency.
-- Virginia Woolf When people have no other tyrant, their own public opinion becomes one.
-- Edward Bulwer-Lytton Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence--a life sentence. Z Look not mournfully into the Past. It comes not back again. Wisely improve the Present. It is
thine. Go forth to meet the shadowy Future, without fear, and with a manly heart.
-- Henry Wadsworth Lo Man must evolve for all human conflict a method which rejects revenge, aggression and
retaliation. the foundation of such a method is love.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. It was a day like this Marco Polo left for China. What are your plans for today?
--Loesje Z
Marriage is low down, but you spend the rest of your life paying for it. Of the seven dwarves, only Dopey had a shaven face. This should tell us something about the
custom of shaving.
-- Tom Robbins, Skinny Legs and All The mathematician lives long and lives young; the wings of his soul do not early drop off, nor do
its pores become clogged with the earthy particles blown from the dusty highways of vulgar life.
-- During the first period of a man's life the greatest danger is not to take the risk.
-- Soren Kierkegaard Of course there's a lot of knowledge in universities: the freshmen bring a little in; the seniors don't
take much away, so knowledge sort of accumulates...
-- Anonymous Z Goodbye, Everybody!
-- Hart Crane, poet, who committed suicide by jumping overboard during a steamship voyage. We live at a time when man believes himself fabulously capable of creation, but he does not
know what to create.
-- Jose Ortega y Gasset People need loving the most when they deserve it the least.
-- John Harrigan Z
Don't ever take a fence down until you know why it was put up.
-- Robert Frost What do you take me for, an idiot?
- General Charles de Gaulle (1890-1970), when a journalist asked him if he was happy A woman has got to love a bad man once or twice in her life to be thankful for a good one.
-- Mae West Victory belongs to the most persevering.
-- Napoleon Bonaparte Every St. Patrick's Day every Irishman goes out to find another Irishman to make a speech to.
-- Shane Leslie Z It's not whether you get knocked down, it's whether you get back up.
-- Vince Lombardi Goodbye, Everybody!
-- Hart Crane, poet, who committed suicide by jumping overboard during a steamship voyage. The mathematician lives long and lives young; the wings of his soul do not early drop off, nor do
its pores become clogged with the earthy particles blown from the dusty highways of vulgar life.
-- Z
We didn't lose the game; we just ran out of time.
- Vince Lombardi "I believe there are more instances of the abridgement of the freedom of the people by gradual and silent encroachments of those in power than by violent and sudden usurpations." (James Madison) Oregon Democratic Senate candidate Tom Bruggere, in describing his support for
comprehensive health care during a candidates' forum, said he supported "erection-to-
resurrection" coverage. He later a "Workers of the world unite; you have nothing to lose but your chains." (Karl Marx) "Some people wear their heart up on their sleeve. I wear mine underneath my right pant leg, strapped to my boot." (Ani Difranco) Z Gentlemen, it is better to have died a small boy than to fumble this football.
-- John Heisman A scar nobly got, or a noble scar, is a good livery of honour; so belike is that.
-- Shakespeare, William "Use what talents you possess; The woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best." (William Blake) Z
If we let people see that kind of thing, there would never again be any war.
-- Pentagon official, on why US military censored graphic footage from the Gulf War "REASONABLE, adj. Accessible to the infection of our own opinions. Hospitable to persuasion, dissuasion and evasion." (Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary) There is one thing stronger than all the armies in the world; and that is an idea whose time has
come.
-- Victor Hugo Parents are the bones upon which children sharpen their teeth.
-- Peter Ustinov They have come up with a perfect understanding. He won't try to run her life, and he won't try to
run his, either.
-- Anonymous Z "Those that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." (Benjamin Franklin) The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his.
- General George Patton "Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain -- and most fools do." (Dale Carnegie) Z
There is no cure for birth and death save to enjoy the interval.
-- George Santayana I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.
-- Douglas Adams "This is the first age that's paid much attention to the future, which is a little ironic since we may not have one." (Arthur C. Clarke) You have it easily in your power to increase the sum total of this world's happiness now. How? By
giving a few words of sincere appreciation to someone who is lonely or discouraged. Perhaps you
will When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. -- Guitry Z "Death where is thy sting? Love, where is thy glory?" (William Shakespeare) "I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it." (Thomas Jefferson, to Archibald Stuart, 1791) If you are afraid of loneliness, do not marry. -- Chekhov Z
It is dangerous for a national candidate to say things that people might remember.
-- Eugene McCarthy "I am a part of all that I have met." (Alfred Lord Tennyson, 1809-1892, English poet) "Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Walk beside me and just be my friend." (Albert Camus) "I love Los Angeles. I love Hollywood. They're beautiful. Everybody's plastic, but I love plastic. I want to be plastic." (Andy Warhol, Holy Terror: Andy Warhol Close Up) With this ring I thee wed, with my body I thee worship, and with all my worldly good I thee endow.
-- Wedding Vow, Book of Common Prayer Z Be willing to make decisions. That's the most important quality in a good leader. Don't fall victim
to what I call the 'ready-aim-aim-aim-aim syndrome.' You must be willing to fire.
-- Gen. George Someone once asked me why women don't gamble as much as men do and I gave the
commonsensical reply that we don't have as much money. That was a true but incomplete
answer. In fact, women's total ins Patriotism is the last refuge of the scoundrel.
-- Samuel Johnson Z
"Be the change that you want to see in the world." (Mohandas Gandhi) Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love.
-- Charlie Brown, character in "Peanuts" comic strip, created by Charles Schultz I read the book of Job last night - I don't think God comes out well in it.
-- Virginia Woolf Man does not live by words alone, despite the fact that he sometimes has to eat them.
-- Adlai Stevenson "I am convinced that it is not the fear of death, of our lives ending that haunts our sleep so much as the fear ... that as far as the world is concerned, we might as well never have lived." (Rabbi H Z The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling.
-- Paula Poundstone Universities incline wits to sophistry and affectation.
-- Francis Bacon The days just before marriage are like a snappy introduction to a tedious book. Z
"Love is blind; friendship closes its eyes." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Hell is a half-filled auditorium.
-- Robert Frost We are the echo of the future.
-- W. S. Merwin There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you
yourself have altered.
-- Nelson Mandela, A Long Walk to Freedom "Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night." (Edger Allen Poe) Z What is the answer? In that case, what is the question?
-- Gertrude Stein, dying words I don't feel good.
-- Luther Burbank, dying words "Life is measured by the rapidity of change, the succession of influences that modify the being." (George Eliot) Z
