Once a boy becomes a man, he's a man all his life, but a woman is only sexy until she becomes
your wife.
-- Al Bundy, character on "Married with Children," U.S. television show Change is not merely necessary to life, it is life.
-- Alvin Toffler Everybody can be great... because anybody can serve. You don't have to have a college degree
to serve. You don't have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. you only need a heart full
of grac "I expect nothing. I fear no one. I am free." (Nikos Kazantzakis) The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.
-- George Bernard Shaw Maps and Views I never think of the future - it comes soon enough.
-- Albert Einstein The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people.
-- Lucille S. Harper We do not remember days; we remember moments.
-- Anonymous Maps and Views
"In times of change learners inherit the earth; while the learned find themselves beautifully equipped to deal with a world that no longer exists." (Eric Hoffer) "The great aim of education is not knowledge but action." (Herbert Spencer) "One of the good things about low self-esteem is never having rain hit you in the face." (John A. Simone Jr.) Man is a rational animal who always loses his temper when he is called upon to act in
accordance with the dictates of reason.
-- Oscar Wilde Life is a great big canvas; throw all the paint on it you can.
-- Danny Kaye Maps and Views "He who speaks of what he knows not only works hard to portray his ignorance." (Joseph Muchemi) Love may be a dream but marriage is a nightmare.
-- Joan Collins Is life so dear, or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains or slavery? Forbid it,
Almighty God! I know not what course others may take but as for me; give me liberty or give me
de Maps and Views
Multimedia? As far as I'm concerned, it's reading with the radio on!
-- Rory Bremner Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.
-- Jackie Mason If you can't feed a hundred people, then feed just one.
-- Mother Teresa Why is it that our memory is good enough to retain the least triviality that happens to us, and yet
not good enough to recollect how often we have told it to the same person?
-- François de La Rouch Why are women so much more interesting to men than men are to women?
-- Virginia Woolf Maps and Views I am going to put myself to sleep now for a bit longer than usual. Call the time Eternity." (Jerzy Kosinski, Polish novelist, from his suicide note) Courage: doing what you're afraid to do. There can be no courage unless you're scared.
-- Eddie Rickenbacker A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest in students.
-- John Ciardi Maps and Views
In the late 1600s the finest instruments originated from three rural families whose workshops
were side by side in the Italian village of Cremona. First were the Amatis, and outside their shop
hung I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain.
-- Carol Leifer We can do no great things; only small things with great love.
-- Mother Teresa They will say you are on the wrong road, if it is your own.
-- Antonio Porchi A dollar saved is a quarter earned.
-- John Ciardi Maps and Views Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.
-- Abraham Lincoln The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing -- and then marry him.
-- Cher By all means marry. If you get a good wife you will become happy, and if you get a bad one you
will become a philosopher.
-- Socrates Maps and Views
Never regard study as a duty, but as the enviable opportunity to learn to know the liberating
influence of beauty in the realm of the spirit for your own personal joy and to the profit of the
commun The trouble with our times is that the future is not what it used to be.
-- Paul Valery The death of democracy is not likely to be an assassination from ambush. It will be a slow
extinction from apathy, indifference, and undernourishment.
-- Robert Hutchins, Great Books, 1954 "Give me liberty or give me death." (Patrick Henry) Mary had a little lamb and the doctor fainted.
-- Anonymous Maps and Views The great end of life is not knowledge, but action. What men need is as much knowledge as they
can organize for action; give them more and it may become injurious. Some men are heavy and
stupid from "The meeting of two personalites is like the contact of two chemical substances. If there is any reaction, both are transformed." (Carl Gustav Jung) Love is an emotion that is based on an opinion of women that is impossible for those who have
had any experience with them.
-- H. L. Mencken Maps and Views
Having once decided to achieve a certain task, achieve it at all costs of tedium and distaste. The
gain in self-confidence of having accomplished a tiresome labor is immense.
-- Thomas Arnold Bennet The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their
attitudes of mind.
-- William James I am in total control, but don't tell my wife. "When we are born we cry that we are come to this great stage of fools." (William Shakespeare) The love we give away is the only love we keep.
-- Elbert Hubbard Maps and Views I never hated a man enough to give him his diamonds back.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them
good.
-- H.L. Mencken My good intentions are completely lethal.
-- Margaret Atwood Maps and Views
I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about 'short' and 'cheap'? -- Phyllis Diller "An imbalance between rich and poor is the oldest and most fatal ailment of all republics." (Plutarch) Education is the state-controlled manufacture of echoes.
-- Norman Douglas Tear open packet, unfold and use.
-- Directions on moist towelette package >From the Far East I send you one single thought, one sole idea--written in red on every
beachhead form Australia to Tokyo--There is no substitute for victory!
-- General Douglas MacArthur Maps and Views "There is only one success: to be able to spend your life in your own way, and not to give others absurd maddening claims upon it." (Christopher Darlington Morley) With this ring I thee wed, with my body I thee worship, and with all my worldly good I thee endow.
-- Wedding Vow, Book of Common Prayer If ever I get married again it would have to be under an anaesthetic.
-- Marie Tonkin Maps and Views
The only weapon that becomes sharper with constant use is the tongue.
-- Anonymous "There is no sin except stupidity." (Oscar Wilde) "If you assume that there's no hope, you guarantee that there will be no hope. If you assume that there is an instinct for freedom, there are opportunities to change things, there's a chance for you t The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post.
-- George Bernard Shaw The cynics are right nine times out of ten.
- Henry Louis Mencken Maps and Views The full use of your powers along lines of excellence.
- definition of happiness by John F. Kennedy I take my wife everywhere I go. She always finds her way back.
-- Henny Youngman Teach a parrot the terms "supply and demand" and you've got an economist.
-- Thomas Carlyle Maps and Views
Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper. A man who marries a woman to educate her falls a victim to the same fallacy as the woman who
marries a man to reform him.
-- Elbert Hubbard I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it by not dying!
-- Woody Allen If law school is so hard to get through... how come there are so many lawyers?
-- Calvin Trillin The real problem is not whether machines think but whether men do.
-- B. F. Skinner Maps and Views The difference between a man who faces death for the sake of an idea and an imitator who goes
in search of martyrdom is that the former expresses his idea most fully in death while the latter
really Fighting is essentially a masculine idea; a woman's weapon is her tongue.
-- Hermione Gingold "If you do not know where you are going, any road will take you there." (Sterling Holloway, voice of Chesire Cat, Alice in Wonderland) Maps and Views
A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.
-- Anonymous Marriage is the one subject on which all women agree and all men disagree.
-- Oscar Wilde "Ah! Don't say you agree with me. When people agree with me I always feel that I must be wrong." (Oscar Wilde) I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way
around Chinatown.
-- Woody Allen "We must view young people not as empty bottles to be filled but as candles to be lit." (Robert Shaffer) Maps and Views Children should be like waffles--you should be able to throw the first one away.
-- Mary Alice Messenger If we do not maintain Justice, Justice will not maintain us.
-- Francis Bacon "We're an embarrasment to college graduates across America." (James Douglas Morrison, lead singer of The Doors) Maps and Views
I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now.... This is an ex-parrot.
-- John Cleese, Monty Python, British comedy television show Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born in it.
-- George Bernard Shaw The better part of valor is discretion.
-- William Shakespeare 1564-1616 from King Henry the Fourth, Part I Giving a man space is like giving a dog a computer: the chances are he will not use it wisely.
-- Bette-Jane Raphael I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor Maps and Views Many a wife thinks her husband is the world's greatest lover. But she can never catch him at it. "I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it." (Thomas Jefferson, to Archibald Stuart, 1791) An act of love that fails is just as much a part of the divine life as an act of love that succeeds, for
love is measured by fullness, not by reception.
-- Harold Loukes Maps and Views
